The Hilarity of Some Punting Guides

[AnthG]

I have read these off and on (and actually followed one to the letter before I knew better when I first started out with this hobby) but looking at them, they really are crafted as works of extreme humour.

I tried searching tonight out of curiosity and found this one. It simply has to be a joke guide for the gullible.

External Link/Members Only

Its titled "A Guide to English Escort Law". And here is some of the advice it gives to allow WGs to keep within the law in the UK.

have a completely foolproof way of getting paid by your client. Firstly, let there be no proof that you took money from your client for sex work. This completely eliminates the sex angle, and there is no legal problem. One of the ways of doing this is to get the payment done through PayPal. It is a convenient online service for payments. Have a prepaid credit card and link this card to your PayPal account. This way you get paid before you meet your client, and at the same time it remains anonymous.

If you want to do it the old way and want to be paid by cash, here is how things should go:
1. The client puts cash inside the envelope and keeps it in the bathroom
2. As soon as you arrive, you ask to go to the bathroom
3. You pick up the money and put it inside your purse and go about your meeting with your client

This is a safe method of payment of cash that escorts have worked out after many years of experience, and it is a foolproof system. It helps you avoid the English law altogether.

Donation; Many escorts call their payments donations instead of fees. Although there is no record of sexual activities that can be proven, donations are yet another layer of security for them. Under this process, escorts ask their clients to place their donations at an undisclosed place and pick them up discreetly.

Contract; Most escorts and agencies have standard contracts drafted, so that the client can read them clearly and sign them. The contracts mention the services provided by the escort and the terms of service. This is usually a very simple deal for most. This is another place where there is potential legal trouble. There shouldn’t be any mention of sexual activities in the contract, because it will then be a clear case of prostitution.
Once the clients sign this agreement, they accept that no sex happened between them and the escort, at least on paper. Why would they resist? After all, it is also their benefit, because they also steer clear of legal troubles.

It really is sheer brilliance that. I have been reading through it trying to find if its a joke site, as it simply has to be. But it seems completely intentional.

Imagine if you booked an outcall and the girl came in and was saying "where is my money" and you were like, "don't you want to go to the bathroom...". She just say no I want my money first.

[OldAdmin]

That "guide" is a bit like the previous thread about setting up card payment network -- those who don't know a single thing about punting yet wanting to make money of prossies or punters, teach them how to punt or sell sex, etc.

[Barry Shipton]

Some of that 'advice' sounds a bit like James999's advice when naive newbies come on with stupid questions. But he's usually a bit more direct so don't think it's his idea of a joke.

The real advice you need is all on here - but some is still scattered across many threads. Maybe we should make more use of Admin's puntingwiki in the 'Guides' menu on here to develop a sensible guide based on our real experience.

[James999]

The "guide" says "Most escorts and agencies have standard contracts drafted, so that the client can read them clearly and sign them"

The reality is most pro$$ies and pimps have trouble reading and writing, and those that don't wouldn't want any audit trail, and as for asking clients to sign contracts 

[Jimmyredcab]

I notice that "Pay Pal" is mentioned as a method of payment, as far as I am aware they do not allow any transactions for sexual services.     

[azrael]

Why on earth would you wat to give a wg your bank details by setting up a payment systrm through your pre paid credit card?

[Silver Birch]

Imagine if you booked an outcall and the girl came in and was saying "where is my money" and you were like, "don't you want to go to the bathroom...". She just say no I want my money first.

 

[Sedlmayer]

The "guide" says "Most escorts and agencies have standard contracts drafted, so that the client can read them clearly and sign them"
[/color]

What?????   In 33 years I have never, ever, been asked to read or sign anything, and I never would, of course. These people are either having a laugh or they know absolutely nothing at all about prostitution in the UK.

I can just see it now - my favourite Hungarian puts a piece of paper in my hand and says, "Darlink, cooould you justa read these and sign it for me pliz?"
And I say, "Yes, of course, but where is the clause that relates to my stuffing you up your arse?" 

[AnthG]

It really is insane

"Under this process, escorts ask their clients to place their donations at an undisclosed place and pick them up discreetly."

Its making paying for a punt sound like a ransom drop off.

Imagine the reaction of going for a punt and the girl saying "where is my money" and you saying you see that tree in the field outside, I have hidden it in that. I will get undressed while you go out with a ladder to climb and get it.

[Sedlmayer]

It really is insane

"Under this process, escorts ask their clients to place their donations at an undisclosed place and pick them up discreetly."

Its making paying for a punt sound like a ransom drop off.

Imagine the reaction of going for a punt and the girl saying "where is my money" and you saying you see that tree in the field outside, I have hidden it in that. I will get undressed while you go out with a ladder to climb and get it.

I think these people have been reading too much John le Carre....

[jcdmj12]

I know what's happened here.  The site owner has paid someone to non-English to do his SEO, and they have just typed a bunch of keyword-filled crap.  It's legible English, but makes very little sense.

[OldAdmin]

I know what's happened here.  The site owner has paid someone to non-English to do his SEO, and they have just typed a bunch of keyword-filled crap.  It's legible English, but makes very little sense.

A good possibility, the site is registered to 'EscortFX' who do websites for prossies and pimps.

[Ben4454]

Even if a working girl was a year long regular I would never give her the money via paypal lol.