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Author Topic: Weird punting experiences  (Read 4778 times)

Offline geostorm1

Thread inspired by the worst punts one, but I've had more "weird" punts than bad ones. I'll start, in no particular order:

1) Used to see a real big BBW escort in Pinxton and then one time just as I get naked she says "My kid is playing in the garden if you hear anything don't worry",  so we continue to fuck and then when we're finished the boy shouts from downstairs something to mummy and she shouts back "be down in a minute go back outside" and then I have to sneak out without the kid seeing me  :wacko:

2) Met a girl in Alfreton who was doing cocaine and offered me some. I've actually never done drugs before but a part of me regrets not trying it as I heard it does make sex even better, although glad not to have that addiction. It definitely made the sex different for her, she turned into an animal.

3) Banged a WG from Church Warsop who I later saw on Jeremy Kyle  :lol: could never track down the video years later.

4) Was at an airport hotel and booked an outcall to my room, she finally arrived eating a big slice of cake, finished up and we did the deed, which was actually pretty good, had some chat after where she seemed sad about having to do this for a job, then she asked me to go for a drink in the bar downstairs but I politely declined.

5) Hotel incall and the girl (Polish or Rom) after the booking said she was hungry and could I help her get some food, so I walked her to Dominos Pizza up the road! Very strange going down the hotel lift with the girl.

6) Saw Marie in Mansfield and then booked a different girl on AW but it was the same address, turns out they were sisters !! Could be wrong but I'm sure I also saw Marie working at a pub last year when I was eating with my family, that could be awkward.

7) Used to see a girl in Nottingham who was very close to my workplace and her disabled husband lived in the house, one day she asks if he can watch and film the sex (no faces) so I say yeah sure. She helps him upstairs and he has a proper camcorder filming me smashing his girl, he loved it. Eventually came all over her face and he shook my hand and left. She also used to supply me with blue pills!

I'm sure there are more but thats all I can remember for now.

Offline Clungehopper

I used to see a lady in Spalding, she was a bit of a strange one to be fair, a BBW who lived in a lovely house (no longer works in the industry and before my time on here) and on one visit as I arrived she was dressed as requested and mowing the rear garden lawn in full heels, no panties and black stockings! (was a ride on mower!) 

We had a bit of a chat and a drink as it was quite warm and she offered me a half price fuck if I finished the grass for her afterwards!! She didn't usually swallow or agree to do anal but again agreed to both provided I finished the lawn for her. I'd always secretly wanted a ride on lawnmower so jumped at the chance, rode her hard and then cut the rest of her grass. She came out sunbathing in her pants whilst I was doing it and had her tits out. She offered to blow me again when I had finished swallowing the lot for a second time!!

I think she may have been on drugs as she went downhill very quickly, very sad but a lovely woman, suspect she was a divorcee giving it a go rather than a seasoned pro. Must have been about 8 years or so ago I reckon.

Online myothernameis

she offered me a half price fuck if I finished the grass for her afterwards!!

There was a escort called Lori, from Glasgow, and she would ask punters, who have a trade to there business, like painters, plumbers, ect.  She would ask if you could do some work for her, like decorate her front room, and in exchange, you get to fuck her a few times

Offline sparkus

Pretty sure there's already several similar threads but I guess people will always want to share stories.

One that's seeped into my subconscious today was mad as box of frogs Kelly who worked several London massage shops, had a tendency to sit astride you strumming herself down below while belting out Chinese folk songs.

Offline PR67

There was a escort called Lori, from Glasgow, and she would ask punters, who have a trade to there business, like painters, plumbers, ect.  She would ask if you could do some work for her, like decorate her front room, and in exchange, you get to fuck her a few times

Saw Lori a few times, bit mental but great fuck. I do remember her putting stuff about tradesmen in her profile. All she ever asked from me was a bottle of wine first time I went. She went to take a scoop out the bottle and knocked out her front tooth.

Offline Steely Dan

Threads overlap and repeat a bit.  Whatever.

I had a hotel outcall in a posh overseas hotel.  Turns out that the fee only included one pop.  I agreed to pay a top up for another.  Other that that annoyance, a very good punt.  So after, we have to walk down to the cash machine together to get the extra fee.  Some guy in the hall sees us and and can SOOO tell that she is an escort (her: hot chinese girl, me: not so much westerner). I mentally shrug and carry on getting the cash with her in tow.  15 seconds later they are having a quiet chat.  30 seconds later they are going up the lift together.

Hotel incall.  She has room service delivered mid punt.  Made me hide in the bathroom as the staff brought tray in.  Finished the punt, but room stunk of Hungarian goulash or something. Cow.  I gave a her a negative, but left out this detail (too easy to identify me) but this was ages ago now.

Once, while talking shit during the down time, mentioned I might go to casino later.  One thing leads to another and after the punt, we go together.  I fund her a few hands of blackjack - but she is too daft to add all the way to 21 with her shoes on.  Ah well, at least she was as fit as a fit thing.  Was back in the casino a week later.  Didn't realise how observant people are - 3 or 4 asked me if my gf was joining me later.  I didn't know before that others even noticed me in the casino every now and then. All good fun.
« Last Edit: March 30, 2021, 02:01:12 pm by Steely Dan »

Offline Vice Admiral

We had a bit of a chat and a drink as it was quite warm and she offered me a half price fuck if I finished the grass for her afterwards!! She didn't usually swallow or agree to do anal but again agreed to both provided I finished the lawn for her. I'd always secretly wanted a ride on lawnmower so jumped at the chance, rode her hard and then cut the rest of her grass. She came out sunbathing in her pants whilst I was doing it and had her tits out. She offered to blow me again when I had finished swallowing the lot for a second time!!

Not all escorts appreciate the value of cash as against "useful services", as your account demonstrates.  A few years ago I had a regular who told me that another of her visitors got a free session in exchange for a couple of hours' gardening.  She seemed to think she was getting a perfectly decent deal - but, unless the gardener in question was Alan Titchmarsh, he was in effect sowing his oats on her flowery bed for about a third of what the "cash purchasers" were paying!

Offline willie loman

Not all escorts appreciate the value of cash as against "useful services", as your account demonstrates.  A few years ago I had a regular who told me that another of her visitors got a free session in exchange for a couple of hours' gardening.  She seemed to think she was getting a perfectly decent deal - but, unless the gardener in question was Alan Titchmarsh, he was in effect sowing his oats on her flowery bed for about a third of what the "cash purchasers" were paying!

maybe she feels like me, that we undervalue manual labour besides its easy to find a wg, getting a gardener is difficult.

Offline willie loman

early on in my punting life, accepted the offer of a hostess in a sex shop in rue st denise and was royally ripped off, later on that summer, saw her on a late night documentary on tv.

Offline Fuggedaboutit

early on in my punting life, accepted the offer of a hostess in a sex shop in rue st denise and was royally ripped off, later on that summer, saw her on a late night documentary on tv.

Victim of similar in Soho...🤦‍♂️
Banned reason: Obsessed with discussing drugs despite previous temp ban
Banned by: daviemac

Offline Cum_again

Not punting, but I once walked into one of those clubs in soho.

I was literally the only person there.

I had a soft drink, The girl in charge then tried to say I owed them £150.  Some bollocks about the service charge with the drink.  I refused to pay.  So she gets a couple of other girls from behind the scenes.  I get up to leave and the EE girl in charge blocks the door with her body.  Coming out with all sorts of bollocks about me. I move to go past her, she steps across me and she starts shouting that I’ve assaulted her.  I just smiled, pointed out that I would be happy for her to call the police as the CCTV camera behind her would show I hadn’t even touched her.  And then, despite three of them around me, they got school boy errored.  I point behind her to the door “watch out luv”, she stepped aside, turned to look and  I nipped out.

So weird.
« Last Edit: March 31, 2021, 10:24:29 pm by Cum_again »

Offline Malvolio

Not punting, but I once walked into one of those clubs in soho.

I was literally the only person there.

I had a soft drink, The girl in charge then tried to say I owed them £150.  Some bollocks about the service charge with the drink.  I refused to pay.  So she gets a couple of other girls from behind the scenes.  I get up to leave and the EE girl in charge blocks the door with her body.  Coming out with all sorts of bollocks about me. I move to go past her, she steps across me and she starts shouting that I’ve assaulted her.  I just smiled, pointed out that I would be happy for her to call the police as the CCTV camera behind her would show I hadn’t even touched her.  And then, despite three of them around me, they got school boy errored.  I point behind her to the door “watch out luv”, she stepped aside, turned to look and  I nipped out.

So weird.

You've just described the standard business model for Soho clip joints, although you missed the bit where some Bond villain henchmen types threaten to beat the shit out of you if you don't pay up.

Offline DaVINCI

Not punting, but I once walked into one of those clubs in soho.

I was literally the only person there.

I had a soft drink, The girl in charge then tried to say I owed them £150.  Some bollocks about the service charge with the drink.  I refused to pay.  So she gets a couple of other girls from behind the scenes.  I get up to leave and the EE girl in charge blocks the door with her body.  Coming out with all sorts of bollocks about me. I move to go past her, she steps across me and she starts shouting that I’ve assaulted her.  I just smiled, pointed out that I would be happy for her to call the police as the CCTV camera behind her would show I hadn’t even touched her.  And then, despite three of them around me, they got school boy errored.  I point behind her to the door “watch out luv”, she stepped aside, turned to look and  I nipped out.

So weird.
I experienced the same situation but I threatened and did call The Police, they then throw a bucket of water of me to destroy my mobile signal.

A Bouncer was then called but the rage I was feeling I barge by him and up the stairs  :mad:.

Disgrace that these clubs were allowed to operate for so long without any intervention.


Offline RAJEC

Not punting, but I once walked into one of those clubs in soho.

I was literally the only person there.

I had a soft drink, The girl in charge then tried to say I owed them £150.  Some bollocks about the service charge with the drink.  I refused to pay.  So she gets a couple of other girls from behind the scenes.  I get up to leave and the EE girl in charge blocks the door with her body.  Coming out with all sorts of bollocks about me. I move to go past her, she steps across me and she starts shouting that I’ve assaulted her.  I just smiled, pointed out that I would be happy for her to call the police as the CCTV camera behind her would show I hadn’t even touched her.  And then, despite three of them around me, they got school boy errored.  I point behind her to the door “watch out luv”, she stepped aside, turned to look and  I nipped out.

So weird.

Same thing happened to me in my early and naive years pre-punting.

They did try and set the heavies on me while I was being frisked by the bird working the bar. He was ready to take my card and force a payment or walk me to a cash point. I clearly remember only having a score on me which she took towards the bill of around 150 sheets for having a drink with a girl. When I got the bill and refused to pay there were some negotiations, but it was obvious what could happen.  Whilst going through my possessions (they made me turn my pockets), the dumb bitch didn’t notice my wallet (it was an unusual contraption that housed all my cards) and assumed the cash was all I had.

She had to let me walk but it was a close call. I avoid those places like the plague.

Online myothernameis

Not punting, but I once walked into one of those clubs in soho.

I was literally the only person there.

I had a soft drink, The girl in charge then tried to say I owed them £150.  Some bollocks about the service charge with the drink.  I refused to pay.  So she gets a couple of other girls from behind the scenes.  I get up to leave and the EE girl in charge blocks the door with her body.  Coming out with all sorts of bollocks about me. I move to go past her, she steps across me and she starts shouting that I’ve assaulted her.  I just smiled, pointed out that I would be happy for her to call the police as the CCTV camera behind her would show I hadn’t even touched her.  And then, despite three of them around me, they got school boy errored.  I point behind her to the door “watch out luv”, she stepped aside, turned to look and  I nipped out.

So weird.

Never went in, as was given advice from a friend who was a police officer, and he knew I was having a holiday in London.  Told me to avoid these places, and be wary of anyone round soho

Offline Dogfather

Was in a foreign country and arranged a punt from the city centre. Had to travel a couple of miles to get to her so got the "Call me when close" standard check.
These were the days before mobiles.

Found a phone box close to her place.
Called the number and it gets picked up. No answer just silence.
I hang on and keep listening.
Some sucking noises and then some "ah's" come down the line.
I keep listening.
I hear some kind of clothing hit the floor followed by an "ooh".
Then a series of movements followed by the sounds of kissing.
Then the unmistakable sound of the bed head hammering against the wall.
At this point, after being in this phone box for about 5 minutes and putting cash in the slot, I decided to put the phone down.

I know. I get it.  :dash:

So went to a brothel 5 minutes away and fucked a 6ft blonde who looked bored out of her mind.

Offline sparkus

Never went in, as was given advice from a friend who was a police officer, and he knew I was having a holiday in London.  Told me to avoid these places, and be wary of anyone round soho

I had an experience in Soho with a couple of mates when I came back from uni one summer, zero to do with punting or the like but I ended up fleeced and two of the Met's finest were involved.  Years later I told the story in Soho to a copper one night who simply patted me on the shoulder and told me I got off lightly.  I'm sure these things don't happen now.

Offline catweazle

I've mentioned this before, but l once had "the itch" but none of my (then) regulars was available. Scoured AW and found a cheapie cheapie girl who, when I rang was immediately available. Wasn't really my type, but was only £30 for a half hour P n D, so I went for it. She texted me the address, in a run down scruffy part of town, old two-up two-down Victorian terraces.

Knocked on the door, and it was one of those old houses where the front door opens straight into the living room. She answered the door, in her tartiest outfit ( big tits spilling out of the top of the blouse, tiny micro skirt and ( as I soon discovered), no knickers.

Led me into the living room, where granny and a toddler of about 5 were sat on the sofa watching Telly Tubbies.

Gran and kiddie ignored us as she led me up the stairs in the corner of the living room to probably the untidiest bedroom I've ever been in.

Threw a pile of clothes off the bed so we could do the dirty.

Back down the stairs, granny and kiddie still glued to the TV.

Offline RAJEC

I've mentioned this before, but l once had "the itch" but none of my (then) regulars was available. Scoured AW and found a cheapie cheapie girl who, when I rang was immediately available. Wasn't really my type, but was only £30 for a half hour P n D, so I went for it. She texted me the address, in a run down scruffy part of town, old two-up two-down Victorian terraces.

Knocked on the door, and it was one of those old houses where the front door opens straight into the living room. She answered the door, in her tartiest outfit ( big tits spilling out of the top of the blouse, tiny micro skirt and ( as I soon discovered), no knickers.

Led me into the living room, where granny and a toddler of about 5 were sat on the sofa watching Telly Tubbies.

Gran and kiddie ignored us as she led me up the stairs in the corner of the living room to probably the untidiest bedroom I've ever been in.

Threw a pile of clothes off the bed so we could do the dirty.

Back down the stairs, granny and kiddie still glued to the TV.

That sounds quality (much less so with the kid there), but the granny hearing the slag getting the granny smashed out of her would be  :lol: :yahoo:

Offline ShadowProclamation

Same thing happened to me in my early and naive years pre-punting.

They did try and set the heavies on me while I was being frisked by the bird working the bar. He was ready to take my card and force a payment or walk me to a cash point. I clearly remember only having a score on me which she took towards the bill of around 150 sheets for having a drink with a girl. When I got the bill and refused to pay there were some negotiations, but it was obvious what could happen.  Whilst going through my possessions (they made me turn my pockets), the dumb bitch didn’t notice my wallet (it was an unusual contraption that housed all my cards) and assumed the cash was all I had.

She had to let me walk but it was a close call. I avoid those places like the plague.

I glad I'm not the only one to have had a bad experience in Soho. I was not aware of clip joints at the time and thought a doorway, with a fit young lady, was an entrance to a stripshow. Once downstairs I was offered an escort from another lady who was clearly foreign. The penny quickly dropped that this was a scam, so I tried to leg it back up the stairs. She blocked my way and yelled for backup. A young, not particularly threatening young man asked me to empty my pockets. They took all the money I had on me and saw my bank card. The lady wrote out a bill for a large sum, with the stolen money subtracted. I realized my easiest way out of there was to agree to go to the nearest cash point with man. Fortunately, the cashpoint was out of cash, with it being an August bank holiday Monday. I offered to go to another cashpoint further away. We agreed to meet back there to pay the difference. As if. I legged it to the nearest tube station and got the hell back to Kings Cross!

Offline Horizontal pleasures

I was a regular at Cynthia Payne's Streatham tea parties with much fun and games.

One day i booked a new lady at a London West End address near Great Portland Street station. I was in shock as it was Cynthia using a different name. It WAS a very good punt indeed. Decades later I cannot now recall her 'pro' name.

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« Last Edit: April 01, 2021, 07:08:07 pm by Horizontal pleasures »

Offline Cum_again

I was a regular at Cynthia Payne's Streatham tea parties with much fun and games.

One day i booked a new lady at a London West End address near Great Portland Street station. I was in shock as it was Cynthia using a different name. It WAS a very good punt indeed. Decades later I cannot now recall her 'pro' name.

External Link/Members Only
Now THAT’s a story and a half.

Offline Lou2019

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Now THAT’s a story and a half.

where have you been lol HP has been harping on with his Cynthia Payne stories since the beginning of time  :D

Offline Young_gent14

Thread inspired by the worst punts one, but I've had more "weird" punts than bad ones.

3) Banged a WG from Church Warsop who I later saw on Jeremy Kyle  :lol: could never track down the video years later.

This has got me in stitches!  :lol: I would have loved to have seen your face at the point you saw her on the show! Brilliant!  :lol:

Offline the_exile

I also managed to dodge a Soho scam - just - where a girl approached me on the street and offered me a session with her and another girl, I just had to go with her and the bloke who was hovering nearby. Was taken by surprise and was going with her, then I picked up on the bad vibes and legged it the first chance I got. I ended up finding a regular on Berwick Street, fortunately didn't see the scammers again even though I was back in the area often.

Not had many weird punts, the weird ones being where there was someone else in the house, sometimes I knew there would be someone there but not where they were - guy who answered the phones on the computer in the room next to the bedroom where I was, only saw him there after I had done the deed. Or discovering there was some bloke on the phone in the room next door, girl had no idea who he was. I decided he must know the score and went ahead and fucked the girl but it was an odd situation.

Offline teddyking

I glad I'm not the only one to have had a bad experience in Soho. I was not aware of clip joints at the time and thought a doorway, with a fit young lady, was an entrance to a stripshow. Once downstairs I was offered an escort from another lady who was clearly foreign. The penny quickly dropped that this was a scam, so I tried to leg it back up the stairs. She blocked my way and yelled for backup. A young, not particularly threatening young man asked me to empty my pockets. They took all the money I had on me and saw my bank card. The lady wrote out a bill for a large sum, with the stolen money subtracted. I realized my easiest way out of there was to agree to go to the nearest cash point with man. Fortunately, the cashpoint was out of cash, with it being an August bank holiday Monday. I offered to go to another cashpoint further away. We agreed to meet back there to pay the difference. As if. I legged it to the nearest tube station and got the hell back to Kings Cross!


Sorry to hear this pal.

I’ve had one time at a usual punt at this girls flat. It was a bait and switch and the girl was average looking and even tried to charge me an extra £20. I said no and tried making my way to leave. She calls out for help and some scrawny guy, probably late 20s shows up and starts shouting at me in a threatening manner telling me to pay.
I have been boxing since I was 9 and I could tell this kid didn’t have heart when he saw me. I smiled at him and told him in no polite terms that he wants , I will fucking smash his head in if he wants me to. Back then I was at my peak, my nose was smashed and I had a healing black eye, so he knew I was ready to smash him up.
 Looking back I wish I did smash his head in just for trying it and today I am still waiting for some cunt to try rob me. Nowadays no one has respect for each other, so we all have to fight our own corner.
Banned reason: Sarcastic twat of a troll
Banned by: daviemac

Offline stevedave

where have you been lol HP has been harping on with his Cynthia Payne stories since the beginning of time  :D

He's been here four years longer than you, perhaps he just doesn't have as much time on his hands  :unknown:

Online Mothball15

early on in my punting life, accepted the offer of a hostess in a sex shop in rue st denise and was royally ripped off, later on that summer, saw her on a late night documentary on tv.

Me also in Paris circa 2007.

Online Mothball15

I glad I'm not the only one to have had a bad experience in Soho. I was not aware of clip joints at the time and thought a doorway, with a fit young lady, was an entrance to a stripshow. Once downstairs I was offered an escort from another lady who was clearly foreign. The penny quickly dropped that this was a scam, so I tried to leg it back up the stairs. She blocked my way and yelled for backup. A young, not particularly threatening young man asked me to empty my pockets. They took all the money I had on me and saw my bank card. The lady wrote out a bill for a large sum, with the stolen money subtracted. I realized my easiest way out of there was to agree to go to the nearest cash point with man. Fortunately, the cashpoint was out of cash, with it being an August bank holiday Monday. I offered to go to another cashpoint further away. We agreed to meet back there to pay the difference. As if. I legged it to the nearest tube station and got the hell back to Kings Cross!

i remember a quote from a poster on this site "Upstairs to Heaven, downstairs to hell" i remember it when i go to london.

Offline Stevelondon

Before I even located to London I had visited a couple of times as an 18-19 year old. Usually football games. 1970ish.

So a bunch of us were in Soho obviously. Jack the lads thinking nobody was gonna rip us off.
Down a flight of stairs to a strip club.
Only it wasn’t. Two blokes behind a desk saying membership required at £5 each (I think...... it was a feckin long time ago.
Another bloke appears on the stairs we just came down (there was three of us)
Anyways..... we paid up.
Fellow on the stairs says “Follow me and I’ll take you to the club”

We followed him round the corner and he points to a strip joint, “Show them your tickets” he says as he walks off.

Of course the strip club says the tickets are worthless and asks us for more money,

So we go to the nearest pub with our tails between our legs. 😂

Only it wasn’t the end of it. We managed to get some stink bombs from this joke shop and later on pelted them down the stairs of the place we had first visited.

Childish and juvenile yes of course. But what a laugh.

I moved to London in 73 and from time to time if I was in the west end, I’d spot some poor oik wandering the streets of Soho.
Bloody hell I would think.
“That was me” 😂
« Last Edit: April 02, 2021, 02:16:19 pm by Stevelondon »

Offline ShadowProclamation

i remember a quote from a poster on this site "Upstairs to Heaven, downstairs to hell" i remember it when i go to london.

Guess I went to hell  :diablo: and paid for my sins. A week later I had clawed back the lost money in wages. I regard it as an adventure, although I was bricking it at the time. The lady who blocked my way said that I had assaulted her and showed the bruises on her left arm. I had pushed against her right arm and certainly not with the kind of force to create bruising.

I heard that the clip joints were cleared out before the London 2012 Olympics. A few years later Soho's sinful area was redeveloped. Last time I went, it seemed like a shadow of its former self.

Offline markballoon

I was in Budapest late one night with a couple of friends.  We were walking from bar to bar.  Next minute 2 stunning women (one early 20s, one late 30s) stopped to talk to us.  No matter what we said they thought we were very funny etc.  They asked us if we wanted to go to a restaurant with them as they liked us so much.  Well our middle aged spidey senses knew something was up so we got away sharpish. 
Later on back at our hotel I looked online and it was a scam.  Big bar bill and then some Hungarian barbarians coming to tear our nuts off.

Offline sparkus

I was in Budapest late one night with a couple of friends.  We were walking from bar to bar.  Next minute 2 stunning women (one early 20s, one late 30s) stopped to talk to us.  No matter what we said they thought we were very funny etc.  They asked us if we wanted to go to a restaurant with them as they liked us so much.  Well our middle aged spidey senses knew something was up so we got away sharpish. 
Later on back at our hotel I looked online and it was a scam.  Big bar bill and then some Hungarian barbarians coming to tear our nuts off.

It happens in most large tourist cities outside western Europe and the US/Canada I think.

Online StingRay

I was targeted in the same way once in Istanbul but fortunately saw it coming - this was actually a friendly man/woman couple though!

Offline Randy Mcknob

Sorry to hear this pal.

I’ve had one time at a usual punt at this girls flat. It was a bait and switch and the girl was average looking and even tried to charge me an extra £20. I said no and tried making my way to leave. She calls out for help and some scrawny guy, probably late 20s shows up and starts shouting at me in a threatening manner telling me to pay.
I have been boxing since I was 9 and I could tell this kid didn’t have heart when he saw me. I smiled at him and told him in no polite terms that he wants , I will fucking smash his head in if he wants me to. Back then I was at my peak, my nose was smashed and I had a healing black eye, so he knew I was ready to smash him up.
 Looking back I wish I did smash his head in just for trying it and today I am still waiting for some cunt to try rob me. Nowadays no one has respect for each other, so we all have to fight our own corner.

You did the right thing mate, you're clearly handy.  Your punt wodge ain't worth, going away for. 

Offline sparkus

I was targeted in the same way once in Istanbul but fortunately saw it coming - this was actually a friendly man/woman couple though!

It happened to a friend in Vietnam, some random bloke approached him outside a bar and asked if he was new to the city and recommended the bar, sat the other side of the bar and raised his glass to him several times before leaving.  Then he was told by the barman that he had to cover his drinks as he'd been told he was been paying and it came to an absolute fortune.  Stood his ground and it caused a scene, the police came and told him the bar owner and the tout were related and that it's a common scam on tourists.

I'm generally quite wary travelling abroad with sudden 'new friends', even fellow Europeans can be in on scams.

Offline rockstar

Another Soho story.
Years ago I popped into a video shop there to see if they had a video with a certain porn star in it (I cant remember who). Anyway the guy went out the back and returned with a video and put it straight in a bag and asked for 20 quid.
I paid and walked out and 5 minutes later looked at it to find it was not what I wanted so went back.
I went in and the guy said come out the back and have a look so I stupidly did. As soon as I walked in the room he slammed the door behind me and started to rant and shout calling me a time waster and trouble maker etc.
I was a little nervous but I tried to reason with him. He then said I am phoning Harry or something and said he will sort me out.

I decided I had to get out so I suddenly shot up and shoulder barged him hard into the wall and ran out and kept running for a couple of miles.

It was 5 years before I ventured back to Soho !

Totally true story.
« Last Edit: April 02, 2021, 10:23:10 pm by rockstar »

Offline Thephoenix

where have you been lol HP has been harping on with his Cynthia Payne stories since the beginning of time  :D

For those interested....tonight on Talking Pictures, Ch81 Freeview, 10.45pm.

Personal Services.....film about Cynthia Payne.
I wonder if HP is in it? :D

Offline teddyking

Another Soho story.
Years ago I popped into a video shop there to see if they had a video with a certain porn star in it (I cant remember who). Anyway the guy went out the back and returned with a video and put it straight in a bag and asked for 20 quid.
I paid and walked out and 5 minutes later looked at it to find it was not what I wanted so went back.
I went in and the guy said come out the back and have a look so I stupidly did. As soon as I walked in the room he slammed the door behind me and started to rant and shout calling me a time waster and trouble maker etc.
I was a little nervous but I tried to reason with him. He then said I am phoning Harry or something and said he will sort me out.

I decided I had to get out so I suddenly shot up and shoulder barged him hard into the wall and ran out and kept running for a couple of miles.

It was 5 years before I ventured back to Soho !

Totally true story.


I would totally love this to happen to me. I would have smashed his fucking head in just for scamming me. I remember on my way to a punt , some tramp tried to rob me , who I believed was robbing other punters. He knew what I was there for and asked me for the money. I told him no and he then started barging me into a wall. At the time , I was shocked, but also pissed because of this stupid ass inconvenience. So I grabbed his head and smashed it into the lamp post behind him and told him to fuck off. This was a much longer story but this was the short story. Didn’t bother going to the punt after in case he called his buddies. Nowadays I avoid fighting back, not worth the extra hassle but one thing for sure if that I don’t let these tramps rob me
« Last Edit: April 03, 2021, 11:53:55 am by teddyking »
Banned reason: Sarcastic twat of a troll
Banned by: daviemac

Offline Young_gent14

For those interested....tonight on Talking Pictures, Ch81 Freeview, 10.45pm.

Personal Services.....film about Cynthia Payne.
I wonder if HP is in it? :D

On sky they have it down as a Comedy!?!?  :lol: :lol: :lol:

Offline signy

On sky they have it down as a Comedy!?!?  :lol: :lol: :lol:

It is, for the most part, a comedy. My money is on HP being the judge at the end.


Offline sotonguy321

A few years ago I had a lunchtime punt with a milf.
Just as she starts sucking my dick her phone rings, which she answers and starts saying well done and congratulations etc.
So she has the phone in one hand and is wanking me with the other whilst I'm sucking on one of her big tits.
Turns out her son had done well in a school test and was phoning to let mum know.
 

Offline Young_gent14

It is, for the most part, a comedy. My money is on HP being the judge at the end.

Hahahaha!  :lol:  :thumbsup:

Offline Horizontal pleasures

It is, for the most part, a comedy. My money is on HP being the judge at the end.
I cannot watch this sort of TV, no subscription and not with the Missus  ....

Offline rockstar


I would totally love this to happen to me. I would have smashed his fucking head in just for scamming me. I remember on my way to a punt , some tramp tried to rob me , who I believed was robbing other punters. He knew what I was there for and asked me for the money. I told him no and he then started barging me into a wall. At the time , I was shocked, but also pissed because of this stupid ass inconvenience. So I grabbed his head and smashed it into the lamp post behind him and told him to fuck off. This was a much longer story but this was the short story. Didn’t bother going to the punt after in case he called his buddies. Nowadays I avoid fighting back, not worth the extra hassle but one thing for sure if that I don’t let these tramps rob me

I understand that but I had no idea who else was in the building and I was told (used to work Security years ago) to stay calm which can make the aggressor relax which then puts you at an advantage.
I did boxing and martial arts when I was younger so I like to think I can look after myself.

Offline PunterNumber69

I went to see a Chinese girl for a massage and FS.  She was very pretty with great big boobs. Massage was good.  FS was a little weird. She kept a wet fannel in one hand the whole time and everytime I kissed or licked her she immediately wiped the area where I'd been.  She did this for the entire time.   Pity as she did look great and I'd have seen her again.

Offline sparkus

I went to see a Chinese girl for a massage and FS.  She was very pretty with great big boobs. Massage was good.  FS was a little weird. She kept a wet fannel in one hand the whole time and everytime I kissed or licked her she immediately wiped the area where I'd been.  She did this for the entire time.   Pity as she did look great and I'd have seen her again.

Recent enough to review?

Offline PunterNumber69

Recent enough to review?
4 years ago, so no. It was in the town centre of Warrington in a private ground floor flat.  Should say flannel damn keyboard. She was cleaning herself the entire time.
« Last Edit: April 18, 2021, 11:16:57 am by PunterNumber69 »

Offline dkn

She kept a wet fannel in one hand the whole time and everytime I kissed or licked her she immediately wiped the area where I'd been.
Double-take here, I originally read that as "she kept a wet fanny in one hand"...

Offline PunterNumber69

I once booked a touring Russian girl who looked amazing in her profile photos (beautiful face, long slender legs, tiny waist). I turned up and it was the girl in the photos. She took her dressing gown off and I discovered she'd come to the UK for a breast reduction operation, so her boobs had freshly stitched T-shaped incisions on and her nipples had been stitched on in their new position. Her boobs were out of bounds. I'd paid for an hour. She wasn't into sex and didn't want her boobs to hang or bounce and did the old cum for me baby" talk, so I did after about 15 minutes. She put her dressing gown back on. We talked for the rest of the time. It turned out she was a 20 yr old Russian porn star who had previously had very floppy boobs that hung very low and that is why she'd had them reduced.  She was escorting to recover the cost of the operation.