Any decent hookup sites for civvies that aren’t a complete scam?

[lillythesavage]

I did a bit of spread betting with dating apps a month ago. First time properly single in seven years, and it was only about three months between relationships, so haven't really done the app thing at all, though I did have a bit of luck with POF, and some other sex/casual hook up site back in 2009/10 - got myself a big-titted 19-year-old sub off there who lived just off Leicester Square, she was a proper little gem (married now with a kid, which I know because we stayed online "friends").

Anyway, downloaded Match - POF - Hinge - Bumble - Tinder - Feeld and got stuck in over the space of a week or two - probably not enough time to really reap the benefits but I didn't enjoy the experience, so had to remove myself. Also joined up to Illicit Encounters and AdultFriendFinder, redirecting my punting budget into subscriptions for a few of these. Now IE was very pricey, which made me work a little bit harder to make it worthwhile, but all good.

I only did most of the apps for a week, here's a quick summary below... Now, the only thing I will say is that, for pretty much all these apps, I used an obscured picture of myself for personal reasons. I'm a good looking guy and I think I would have had much better results if I'd have put some proper pictures on my profiles, so bear that in mind with the summaries below.

Match and POF felt very housewife-heavy, I didn't buy subscriptions for these but I got a lot of 'likes' and matches, even though my pic was obscured... which is encouraging but also slightly worrying!

Hinge - Had a couple of reasonably fit local girls in chat, but they weren't exciting enough for me and both seemed to want long-term stuff. Left and passed on my number but neither followed up.

Bumble - Same as above, two decent girls up for chat - though one got into sex chat pretty quickly. I left within a week and messaged them both with my number. The sex chat one got in touch and we'd been chatting ever since until she went away last week and I've not heard anything since, so maybe she had a change of heart. We'll see, can't remember when she was supposed to be back.

Tinder - Hated it. BUT, had a similar situation to the sex chat woman above (though less sex chat and more light flirtation). Couldn't stand Tinder, so left within a few days, passed my number over and she messaged me. Chat started getting quite naughty once we were on WhatsApp and, after trying to get me out on a date (which I pretty much blanked), she invited me round. Cooked me dinner and we had a little romp, which was alright, but not great. Been back a second time and it was even less exciting (she smokes which she hadn't told me before we met and was a turn off). Nice girl but very much doubt I'll be seeing her again and she's already picking up on my lack of interest.

Feeld - Had high hopes and there seemed to be a lot of open-minded people on there but got absolutely nowhere with it. Two chats that quickly fizzled out. Felt like there were a LOT of people who are quite up themselves, young liberals trying too hard to be unique, if that makes sense?

AdultFriendFinder - Did a ton of messaging - copying and pasting the same text but personalising every one. Honestly did about 100 messages or more during a two-week period. Only response that has got close to a meet is with an older couple who want an extra man to play with. Hopefully meeting them for a 'get to know each other' drink soon, and we'll see where that goes.

Illicit Encounters - Saved this for last as it's been my most successful one. The steep membership fee really motivated me to get my money's worth. Did similar blanket messaging to AFF, and got some decent chats going. NOW, here's the thing... I pretended to be in a relationship on there as I read a few profiles that didn't want single guys, and justified the lie by telling myself, "They're cheating anyway". Two wrongs don't make a right I know, but hey... Also means I have a decent 'get out of jail' card if I want to call time (The wife caught me out or something similar).

Anyway, I have four women now fully engaged on Kik. One mature lady with 40G tits who I've had two hotel sessions with already, a much slimmer one closer to my age, who I've had a drink with and will be doing a hotel sesh with next week - plus two others who are edging ever closer to meeting me and I'm almost certain will also be up for some shenanigans.

When I'm in a position to put some proper pics up and dedicate a bit more time to jazzing up my profile/chatting shit I can imagine I'll be a lot more successful. Still, for relatively little time and cash investment, I've not done too badly I guess.

Not too bad if you only gave it a week, I assume these were all non ppm encounters?

[JPin]

PPM is pay per meet yeah? Definitely no PPM, in fact the big-titted one paid for the hotel room both times and so has the slim one for next week's liaison.

Only cash I've paid so far is for the app/website subscriptions.

I quite liked Illicit Encounters, though I haven't seen much favourable feedback on here.

[lillythesavage]

PPM is pay per meet yeah? Definitely no PPM, in fact the big-titted one paid for the hotel room both times and so has the slim one for next week's liaison.

Only cash I've paid so far is for the app/website subscriptions.

I quite liked Illicit Encounters, though I haven't seen much favourable feedback on here.

Interesting, they don,t work well for us older guys though, well not in my experience, the ppm does though. I think most on these sites are looking for similar age or younger, women I mean, or something they want and cannot experience in every day life.

[JPin]

Yeah I'll save ppm for when I'm a bit older. I guess I'm at a decent age, not in the proper "mature" category but a fair bit older than 18+ year olds, but also young enough for the older ladies to get excited.

Forgot to mention, the 40G tits one was literally squirting every few minutes when I was banging her. The bedsheets were soaked.

[lillythesavage]

Yeah I'll save ppm for when I'm a bit older. I guess I'm at a decent age, not in the proper "mature" category but a fair bit older than 18+ year olds, but also young enough for the older ladies to get excited.

Forgot to mention, the 40G tits one was literally squirting every few minutes when I was banging her. The bedsheets were soaked.

You should be charging her on top of the hotel, love a squirter.

[Sumpy]

Must admit I am 62 and on illicit encounters, not having much luck at all. There seems to be very slim pickings up north at the moment. Looking at the bottom left hand side of the screen the numbers are very low so beginning to think I have wasted my money right now. 18 months ago it was a lot different.

[JPin]

You should be charging her on top of the hotel, love a squirter.

Second civvie one I've had. Last one was a gorgeous borderline size 10/12, 19-year-old Lithuanian with lovely tits and a great attitude. She's a lot slimmer now (stayed "friends" on social media). Had some amazing hotel sessions with her, first time she squirted I was gobsmacked. We had a good thing going until she let her emotions get the better of her. Usual story... 

[JPin]

Must admit I am 62 and on illicit encounters, not having much luck at all. There seems to be very slim pickings up north at the moment. Looking at the bottom left hand side of the screen the numbers are very low so beginning to think I have wasted my money right now. 18 months ago it was a lot different.

Have you tried widening the search to surrounding counties? And then doing the copy and paste message thing?

I had about 10 women on the go, but I soon whittled them down to the ones I’m still talking to/meeting now.

[Sumpy]

Yes mate, Cumbria, Lancashire, Manchester, and West Yorkshire. Filtered 50 and above, so not many. This is my second time on there, did the copy and paste thing last time but not this, will give it a go though.

Thanks very much for the advice I really appreciate it as I am very rusty at the dating game and very new to punting so need every bit of help I can get.

[Marmalade]

I did a bit of spread betting with dating apps a month ago.

Interesting comparisons. 

Seeking seems to be the major one you missed. Out of interest, any reason why you skipped it?
External Link/Members Only

On IllicitEncounters, what persuaded you to fork out the hefty fee for a relatively unknown site?
External Link/Members Only

An overview (not suggesting the review site is unbiased — they might well take a cut — but it gives a general run down)
External Link/Members Only

It also occurs to me that although it’s not strictly punting (so maybe not suited for the wiki) having our own overview of such sites (costs etc) might be an idea. Perhaps save some repeat questions on multiple threads.

[Markus]

Have you tried widening the search to surrounding counties? And then doing the copy and paste message thing?

I had about 10 women on the go, but I soon whittled them down to the ones I’m still talking to/meeting now.

What age bracket are you out of curiosity?  I am considering Illicit Encounters but it is a hefty fee for a relatively unknown site.  Most of the profiles don’t have pictures which I can understand due to discretion. Do you get them in to WA and exchange pics?

[Sumpy]

I am 62.  You can upload photos and chat on the site it’s all inclusive.

[JPin]

Interesting comparisons. 

Seeking seems to be the major one you missed. Out of interest, any reason why you skipped it?
External Link/Members Only

Hey how's it going?

I didn't really fancy getting into a SB/SD situation, I was more focused on "free" hook ups - and by that I mean, paying to be on a site, but not paying to meet. So far I haven't really spent any cash on meeting these women, a tiny bit on travel and one lemonade & lime in some dingy old pub. Of course, I spent time and energy on contacting/messaging them, but don't you have to do that on Seeking too, and then also shell out for their company/whatever arrangement you agree on?

Not for me right now, maybe when I'm older and more affluent.

[Sumpy]

Hi, good thanks.
Yes, sort of felt the same and thought SA was going to be too expensive for me.

[JPin]

What age bracket are you out of curiosity?  I am considering Illicit Encounters but it is a hefty fee for a relatively unknown site.  Most of the profiles don’t have pictures which I can understand due to discretion. Do you get them in to WA and exchange pics?

I'm early 40s.

Profiles have pictures but they're password protected. People share their password when they feel comfortable. I just included my password in my initial message to save time.

I also broadened my search, covering London - Berkshire - Oxfordshire - Bucks and even down to Bath/Bristol... One of the women I'm chatting to is in Taunton but she's cool with me being where I am because she used to drive to Ruislip and back to see someone there. Which is way further than where I live.

Personally, I thought it was worth the fee. Ok it was more work than simply selecting a girl on AW and booking her, but for the fee I paid I've pretty much got four women in the bag. I'm sure if I'd been more focused/committed I'd have got even more. Once I'd got my standard message template sorted, then it was a bit of a breeze to be honest. Just carpet bombed the profiles and waited for responses.

With every messaged I tailored it slightly to appeal to the woman's profile. Always finding commonalities or making jokes about things they'd said... Didn't always work but the more you message the higher the chances of success.

I have to admit, and I found this with all the dating sites/apps, I got impatient with all the inane chatter and went cold on a few women where I probably could have made more effort and got better results.

It's mostly women looking for everything they're not getting at home; companionship, attention, kisses, cuddles, fun... sad really, but that means there's a lot of members who want a long-term, exclusive extramarital partner. But there are those who just want a casual fling, and the rare ones who just want to get banged.

I just thought I can pretend to be in a relationship, get a few meets in and then call time using my "relationship" or "family" as an excuse, and they're none the wiser.

Dunno what's happened to my morals this year!

[Payyourwaymate]

Unlucky in love woman SUES dating agency and demands a full refund after dud rendezvous - and complains she was matched with a man less than 6-foot tall

External Link/Members Only

"Dr Moore was searching for 'Mr Right' when she joined the exclusive dating agency in 2019....

'I was at a stage where I was ready to settle down, get married and start a family,' she said.

'I was a career woman, I was 36 … I was ready to embark on the next chapter of my life.'

Dr Moore is is hoping to get the $4,995 refund and apology letter on top of the legal costs and extras for alleged misleading conduct, bullying and breach of verbal contract. "

[lillythesavage]

I am 62.  You can upload photos and chat on the site it’s all inclusive.

Go for 20 somethings, 30,s and 40,s simply do not have any interest in 60,s, my experience anyway, and I do not want to meet my age or older. in fairness I prefer ppm so it might be different on the dating sites if you give it more time, was not when I tried though so gave it up. Not wanting to date anyway.

[Sumpy]

Thanks for that, I suppose I am heading the same way really. In the back of my mind I didn’t think that the younger end would be interested in me. But hey, they will either respond or not I suppose and it won’t be the first time I have been told to fuck off.

[southcoastpunter]

In the back of my mind I didn’t think that the younger end would be interested in me. But hey, they will either respond or not I suppose and it won’t be the first time I have been told to fuck off.

I am on SA and in my early 60's (although i can get away with mid 50's and have 56 on my profile) and have been surprised at what so many ladies in the 20's say about guys their own age:
- they are idiots
- they are more interested in the own body image than my body
- they are always on their phones and don't talk to me
- they don't know how to treat a lady
- they have little or no respect for women
- they watch too much porn and want "all that" on date one!

and hence they are very open to an older guy  - so you might be surprised by the response you get!

[Sumpy]

Once again thanks, that’s very encouraging to know. Just goes to show my lack of knowledge and experience.

[Markus]

I keep getting offers for Illicit Encounters as steep as it is (3 weeks for £100).  For that kind of money, it should have a high success rate for people to meet up.

Toss up between Illicit Encounters or back to Seeking?  Thoughts from any on either at present?  Or should I wait for University to start before I get on Seeking?

[lillythesavage]

Thanks for that, I suppose I am heading the same way really. In the back of my mind I didn’t think that the younger end would be interested in me. But hey, they will either respond or not I suppose and it won’t be the first time I have been told to fuck off.

My punting preference has always been 30,s and 40,s, well since I turned 50, and when I tried the ppm route looking for the same it was not working at all.

Opened up to the younger ones and not looked back, not looked for anyone new for at least two months now, and not met all the ones I chat with, got a polite " how are you" message from a 21 years old bubble butt Nigerian I have not seen for a month or so, the oldest of the pool is 28 and if I told you the ppm price for them you would not believe me and I never negotiate down, just accept or dismiss what they ask for. In my mind negotiating puts a dampener on the mood.

What the other fella said is spot on, young guys just want to be sucked and pound pussy, like a few on here , they want to explore more and actually enjoy sex and us older guys will pay them for the pleasure.

[sparkus]

After reading this recent intel I did look into Illicit Encounters but just couldn't justify that outlay as well as I'm sceptical that they will fork out for the hotel (as their place won't be an option).

Someone via PM claims he's had some successes still on POF, it probably is worth a go...

Plenty of PPM merchants on Tinder which I can't be dealing with and the odd tourist (including one down from oop north on hols with her parents!) but nothing which has been convertable of late.  Work has been manic so I tend to just slot in after/during work punts these days before home.

[JPin]

After reading this recent intel I did look into Illicit Encounters but just couldn't justify that outlay as well as I'm sceptical that they will fork out for the hotel (as their place won't be an option).

Someone via PM claims he's had some successes still on POF, it probably is worth a go...

Plenty of PPM merchants on Tinder which I can't be dealing with and the odd tourist (including one down from oop north on hols with her parents!) but nothing which has been convertable of late.  Work has been manic so I tend to just slot in after/during work punts these days before home.

Yeah, I mean a week or two of dating apps/sites was enough to put me off and send me back into punting.

[lillythesavage]

I keep getting offers for Illicit Encounters as steep as it is (3 weeks for £100).  For that kind of money, it should have a high success rate for people to meet up.

Toss up between Illicit Encounters or back to Seeking?  Thoughts from any on either at present?  Or should I wait for University to start before I get on Seeking?

Very much depends where you are, tried them all and do not use either of those, or any of the dating apps mentioned anymore.

[sparkus]

Yeah, I mean a week or two of dating apps/sites was enough to put me off and send me back into punting.

What sucks about dating sites (or dating in general) is that you have to WORK for the shag ie. got through the motions of text chat (in the knowledge you could be blocked at any moment or just not responded to) and then knackering small talk on the date itself.  One thing taken care of with punting.

[Rick2468]

What sucks about dating sites (or dating in general) is that you have to WORK for the shag ie. got through the motions of text chat (in the knowledge you could be blocked at any moment or just not responded to) and then knackering small talk on the date itself.  One thing taken care of with punting.

I consider the main reason I started punting was I spent 6 months wining and dining someone I really liked and slept with her just 3 times during the whole 6 months. She was a high flyer with expensive tastes so hanging out with her was pricey. She would always pay her half but still spent more money in that 6 months than I usually do in a few years. I felt sexually frustrated throughout the whole experience and I remember thinking with all this money I spent going out with her I could have shagged 20 gorgeous hookers so ended up making a booking.

[Marmalade]

What sucks about dating sites (or dating in general) is that you have to WORK for the shag ie. got through the motions of text chat (in the knowledge you could be blocked at any moment or just not responded to) and then knackering small talk on the date itself.  One thing taken care of with punting.

Not to mention (taking the two sites of your recent post) the dangerous line “it was nice to meet you on POF” and she replies with a slight scowl, “It was Tinder actually”!

Beware of mix n match ha!

[Watts.E.Dunn]

I consider the main reason I started punting was I spent 6 months wining and dining someone I really liked and slept with her just 3 times during the whole 6 months. She was a high flyer with expensive tastes so hanging out with her was pricey. She would always pay her half but still spent more money in that 6 months than I usually do in a few years. I felt sexually frustrated throughout the whole experience and I remember thinking with all this money I spent going out with her I could have shagged 20 gorgeous hookers so ended up making a booking.

Had one like that a few years ago bloody lived up to her countrys supposed reputation for money, bloody tighter that the proverbial ducks arse!!

Glad i knocked it on the head soon enough!...

[Ali Katt]

What sucks about dating sites (or dating in general) is that you have to WORK for the shag ie. got through the motions of text chat (in the knowledge you could be blocked at any moment or just not responded to) and then knackering small talk on the date itself.  One thing taken care of with punting.

I think with punting you pay them to leave as well as the convineance. Nothing beats a fuck with someone who fancies the arse off you though.

[sparkus]

I think with punting you pay them to leave as well as the convineance. Nothing beats a fuck with someone who fancies the arse off you though.

Obviously we all have different motivations but I'm pretty much indifferent to that.  Both punting and dating site flings are just about having access to the bodies of women I wouldn't get to otherwise.

Jack Nicholson had that quote about "you're paying her to leave".

Good luck with the convenience, look at how many of us don't get to see the women we want to when we can and have to see a "Plan B".

[JPin]

What sucks about dating sites (or dating in general) is that you have to WORK for the shag ie. got through the motions of text chat (in the knowledge you could be blocked at any moment or just not responded to) and then knackering small talk on the date itself.  One thing taken care of with punting.

Yeah, I had a couple virtually scold me for not being attentive with messaging already. I don't need that shit, we're supposed to be adults embarking on a 'casual fling' and they're getting needy. Already! I think the thing is, a lot of women just expect to be showered with attention, no matter what the situation. They don't want to be made to feel like it's "just" about sex.

Even on AdultFriendFinder, where there's these supposedly "wanton sluts" hankering for group sex etc... they still need a lot of chat/charm/warming up, before you even get to the point of a possible meet. I'm not saying it's not worth the work (in some cases) but at this stage in my life, post-break up and with little energy/time to put the effort in, I'd much rather punt because it's guaranteed you're getting laid, most SPs I meet are good company for the time I spend with them as well and there's no pressure/expectation to be in communication once it's done. That's all I need right now.

That story from the guy who spent six months with a woman who barely put out is a prime example of the time/energy/money we waste hoping for some regular sex. We all know a lot of (most?) women use their pussies as a carrot on a stick to keep men hanging on and chasing for as long as they will endure. That's how some of us end up trapped in relationships I'm sure.

I can't be arsed chasing/playing that game right now, punting has given me the confidence to just sack them off way quicker than I would have done in the past.

[sparkus]

Yeah, I had a couple virtually scold me for not being attentive with messaging already. I don't need that shit, we're supposed to be adults embarking on a 'casual fling' and they're getting needy. Already! I think the thing is, a lot of women just expect to be showered with attention, no matter what the situation. They don't want to be made to feel like it's "just" about sex.

Even on AdultFriendFinder, where there's these supposedly "wanton sluts" hankering for group sex etc... they still need a lot of chat/charm/warming up, before you even get to the point of a possible meet. I'm not saying it's not worth the work (in some cases) but at this stage in my life, post-break up and with little energy/time to put the effort in, I'd much rather punt because it's guaranteed you're getting laid, most SPs I meet are good company for the time I spend with them as well and there's no pressure/expectation to be in communication once it's done. That's all I need right now.

That story from the guy who spent six months with a woman who barely put out is a prime example of the time/energy/money we waste hoping for some regular sex. We all know a lot of (most?) women use their pussies as a carrot on a stick to keep men hanging on and chasing for as long as they will endure. That's how some of us end up trapped in relationships I'm sure.

I can't be arsed chasing/playing that game right now, punting has given me the confidence to just sack them off way quicker than I would have done in the past.

Met one chick online with absolutely hewge chebs on a buxom frame, was determined to get them out as the pictoral evidence of them was mouth-watering.  She alluded to the fact that she'd seen one bloke for a while just for sex who she'd met online so it looked hopeful.  I then just didn't hear from her for weeks, she later got in touch to say she'd been hit with a double whammy of loads of work and processing a house sale (I know how draining that it is, so yeah).  We then agreed to meet and I had to cancel another date (which on reflection would have been as good) and in person she had a fucked up hairline and the lousiest personality ever, which I had to sit and listen to for two hours.  Just to rub it in, literally, gave me a big squeeze at the end cos she's a hugger.

[JPin]

  It’s just wasting life!

[Payyourwaymate]

Met one chick online with absolutely hewge chebs on a buxom frame, was determined to get them out as the pictoral evidence of them was mouth-watering.  She alluded to the fact that she'd seen one bloke for a while just for sex who she'd met online so it looked hopeful.  I then just didn't hear from her for weeks, she later got in touch to say she'd been hit with a double whammy of loads of work and processing a house sale (I know how draining that it is, so yeah).  We then agreed to meet and I had to cancel another date (which on reflection would have been as good) and in person she had a fucked up hairline and the lousiest personality ever, which I had to sit and listen to for two hours.  Just to rub it in, literally, gave me a big squeeze at the end cos she's a hugger.

  .

[fudi_maar]

@JPin, thanks for a great writeup on the apps/sites. Also, kudos to you for having good success with civvies. That's the best sex, as it's non-transactional.

Whenever I'm travelling (pre-Covid), I use Tinder - and I love it. Have had tons of success with it. There's lots of escorts on there depending on which part of the world you are in, but I use it just for civvies. Also used to use Seeking and that was good too a few years when there were quite a few genuine girls on there who just wanted to date successful guys. Nowadays it seems too much like AW.
I met a Pakistan woman on there who was dying to bang right from the get-go and we did the deed in a hotel a few days later. She was a dirty slut, and liked it rough.

[sparkus]

@JPin, thanks for a great writeup on the apps/sites. Also, kudos to you for having good success with civvies. That's the best sex, as it's non-transactional.

Whenever I'm travelling (pre-Covid), I use Tinder - and I love it. Have had tons of success with it. There's lots of escorts on there depending on which part of the world you are in, but I use it just for civvies. Also used to use Seeking and that was good too a few years when there were quite a few genuine girls on there who just wanted to date successful guys. Nowadays it seems too much like AW.
I met a Pakistan woman on there who was dying to bang right from the get-go and we did the deed in a hotel a few days later. She was a dirty slut, and liked it rough.

If work does return to normal then I will be back on the road and utilising the app to its full potential - even got one to come down to London for the second date.

[Rick2468]

Had a nice surprise in Iceland of all places this morning. I went through the till and the woman wrote something on the receipt which I didn't think was odd. Then I checked it whilst walking home and she had put her telephone number on it! I assume it was her number but I added it to WhatsApp and no profile photo came up so not sure. I had noticed the woman looking at me a lot whenever I went in but I assumed she was just checking I didn't nick anything! It was a nice surprise, especially as I usually just wear trackie bottoms and a hoodie whenever I go in. She is attractive but must be 20 years younger than me so I am not going there! Still it is nice to have "pulled" before 9am on a Monday!

Also got another facebook message from the Canadian love of my life who I have mentioned before. She said she was coming to London in December. I told her I was in a relationship and it felt weird meeting. She said "and?" when I mentioned it lol. I know it is right not to meet with her as I can't see any good coming from it and it will fuck my head up, just getting a message from her in the first place was a head fuck. I even considered calling her a fucking bitch just to make sure she wouldn't ask to meet up again and take the decision out of my hands.

[tynetunnel]

Had a nice surprise in Iceland of all places this morning. I went through the till and the woman wrote something on the receipt which I didn't think was odd. Then I checked it whilst walking home and she had put her telephone number on it! I assume it was her number but I added it to WhatsApp and no profile photo came up so not sure. I had noticed the woman looking at me a lot whenever I went in but I assumed she was just checking I didn't nick anything! It was a nice surprise, especially as I usually just wear trackie bottoms and a hoodie whenever I go in. She is attractive but must be 20 years younger than me so I am not going there! Still it is nice to have "pulled" before 9am on a Monday!

Go on, give her a message with your punting phone. Nothing to lose! I would!

Also got another facebook message from the Canadian love of my life who I have mentioned before. She said she was coming to London in December. I told her I was in a relationship and it felt weird meeting. She said "and?" when I mentioned it lol. I know it is right not to meet with her as I can't see any good coming from it and it will fuck my head up, just getting a message from her in the first place was a head fuck. I even considered calling her a fucking bitch just to make sure she wouldn't ask to meet up again and take the decision out of my hands.

You don’t need to reply with something nasty, just message her to say it’s better if you both move on, then block her. But you can’t because a “love of my life” is under your skin, and you’ll never cut her out of your life. May as well meet her! 

[sir wanksalot]

Had a nice surprise in Iceland of all places this morning. I went through the till and the woman wrote something on the receipt which I didn't think was odd. Then I checked it whilst walking home and she had put her telephone number on it! I assume it was her number but I added it to WhatsApp and no profile photo came up so not sure. I had noticed the woman looking at me a lot whenever I went in but I assumed she was just checking I didn't nick anything! It was a nice surprise, especially as I usually just wear trackie bottoms and a hoodie whenever I go in. She is attractive but must be 20 years younger than me so I am not going there! Still it is nice to have "pulled" before 9am on a Monday!

Also got another facebook message from the Canadian love of my life who I have mentioned before. She said she was coming to London in December. I told her I was in a relationship and it felt weird meeting. She said "and?" when I mentioned it lol. I know it is right not to meet with her as I can't see any good coming from it and it will fuck my head up, just getting a message from her in the first place was a head fuck. I even considered calling her a fucking bitch just to make sure she wouldn't ask to meet up again and take the decision out of my hands.

I think I hate you 

[Rick2468]

Go on, give her a message with your punting phone. Nothing to lose! I would!
You don’t need to reply with something nasty, just message her to say it’s better if you both move on, then block her. But you can’t because a “love of my life” is under your skin, and you’ll never cut her out of your life. May as well meet her! 

I am actually in a relationship which is the main reason I won't contact the Iceland lady. Even if I was single I don't think I would go there.

i won't send anything nasty to Miss Canada, it's definitely not how I feel about her but I just don't want this situation to arise again in future. I wish she had never asked in the first place. The crazy thing is we only dated for 6 weeks back in 2014 haha so it's weird that I love her so much. She was so full of life, stunningly pretty and really filthy haha. Also from a very rich family and seemed really into me which I loved. I do like my current girlfriend a lot but I don't think I will ever fully get over Miss Canada. I had a theory that she kind of likes the chase part of the relationship when everything is new which is why she was intense with me then quickly moved on. The weird thing is I looked at her facebook and there are still photos of us with our arms around each other looking couply but I don't see similar pictures of her with other blokes.

Damn I'm reading into things that aren't there again haha. Truly fucked over this.

[sparkus]

I am actually in a relationship which is the main reason I won't contact the Iceland lady. Even if I was single I don't think I would go there.

Alternatively... anyone that age working in a budget supermarket will be on a very low wage and she may have debts etc.

If she's that young compared to you then it's not beyond the realms of possibility that she might hope to snag an older solvent bloke to assist with her finances.

I thought of your situation as someone I know met someone online with a big age gap and she's started asking him for supposed one-off assistance.

[willie loman]

Alternatively... anyone that age working in a budget supermarket will be on a very low wage and she may have debts etc.

If she's that young compared to you then it's not beyond the realms of possibility that she might hope to snag an older solvent bloke to assist with her finances.

I thought of your situation as someone I know met someone online with a big age gap and she's started asking him for supposed one-off assistance.

i thought he meant the country, not the shop, i haven been to either.

[AJAK92]

I haven't had any luck whatever with online dating sites and i'm not a bad looking guy. I cannot even get a conversation, let alone a date. I don't know what i'm doing wrong. When I get matches, its usually oriental women that i'm not attracted to. So frustrating.

SA work's but i'm not a sugar daddy

[Payyourwaymate]

I haven't had any luck whatever with online dating sites and i'm not a bad looking guy. I cannot even get a conversation, let alone a date. I don't know what i'm doing wrong. When I get matches, its usually oriental women that i'm not attracted to. So frustrating.

SA work's but i'm not a sugar daddy

"Whatever the case, dating statistics point to apps being favoured more by UK men than women. As many as 85% of app users in the country are men, a number which is even higher on Tinder, where there is around one woman per nine male users."

External Link/Members Only


Gender demographics UK 2021
Age    Percentage of users
Female    9
Male    89

External Link/Members Only


It's nothing to do with you. You are playing a rigged game lol.

[Sumpy]

Just to let you all know I, quite stupidly, have been caught out by the auto renewal on illicit encounters. Even though my membership hadn’t finished I was still too late and they refused to refund me. I now have a months membership I don’t want.

In the past I have avoided any site that has this auto renewal as I view it as a scam and I fell into the trap of forgetting to cancel soon enough. So, £99 out of pocket for 1 month membership which I stand very little chance of meeting anyone.

[tynetunnel]

Just to let you all know I, quite stupidly, have been caught out by the auto renewal on illicit encounters. Even though my membership hadn’t finished I was still too late and they refused to refund me. I now have a months membership I don’t want.

In the past I have avoided any site that has this auto renewal as I view it as a scam and I fell into the trap of forgetting to cancel soon enough. So, £99 out of pocket for 1 month membership which I stand very little chance of meeting anyone.

Tell them that this is an unauthorised payment as your paid membership had not expired, and advise that if they don’t play ball you will be contacting your card issuer to implement a chargeback. They will wish to avoid such a situation 

[Sumpy]

Thank you very much for that and have taken your advice, much appreciated.

[tynetunnel]

Thank you very much for that and have taken your advice, much appreciated.

Good lad!  Please update once you have an outcome

[Ali Katt]

* Noticed there's a disproportionate number of Jam Rolls on Badoo.

* Noticed it's only gay blokes who contact me on Fab. So I've blocked them.