Strange things going on

[freeze44]

Just wondering what effect the current situation is having on life where you are?

I've seen lots of people painting fences, sometimes in odd colours (the blue the worst to me imo!) and might lead to a general tidy and smarten up!

I've cleared my garage out, but the tip will be closed? Bonfires ok though?! Am I getting very dull very quickly?   

My next move is some home based sports maybe! That includes checking the neighbours out  Call me Michael Payne, a nosey neighbour!

Ideas to things to do? What keeps the retired busy??! Don't want to end up wanking all the time! 

[mr.bluesky]

Just wondering what effect the current situation is having on life where you are?

I've seen lots of people painting fences, sometimes in odd colours (the blue the worst to me imo!) and might lead to a general tidy and smarten up!

I've cleared my garage out, but the tip will be closed? Bonfires ok though?! Am I getting very dull very quickly?   

My next move is some home based sports maybe! That includes checking the neighbours out  Call me Michael Payne, a nosey neighbour!

Ideas to things to do? What keeps the retired busy??! Don't want to end up wanking all the time! 

I will make a effort to enjoy the great outdoors more. Perhaps take up dogging 

[freeze44]

I will make a effort to enjoy the great outdoors more. Perhaps take up dogging 

  is that on the allowed list?? Might ask the bbc Q&A thing!

[WARSZAWA16]

is that on the allowed list?? Might ask the bbc Q&A thing!

Don't wish to be a spoilsport but it sounds like it's more than 2 people - the "dogger" and the 2 (+?) in the vehicle. Therefore it could possibly incur a £30 fine under the new regulation if spotted by the police.

[badsin]

Don't wish to be a spoilsport but it sounds like it's more than 2 people - the "dogger" and the 2 (+?) in the vehicle. Therefore it could possibly incur a £30 fine under the new regulation if spotted by the police.

Don't wind the windows down

[MilleMiglia]

I've been doing a lot of cleaning jobs, that hadn't previously occurred to me, or which had been done so-so. I was rather taken aback at how much came off things, especially the inside of the windows, given that I don't smoke.

[MrMatrix]

I'm continuing rebuilding my workshop. Looking very good. I've got loads of building materials and timber so should see the end of all this. And finishing off lots of other jobs round the house that should have been done 10 years ago. Its never bloody ending really
 

[Blackpool Rock]

Yeah there does seem to suddenly be an interest in DIY and all those forgotten projects around houses.
I've been for a walk and a bike ride on Blackpool prom in the last 5 days and there were a lot of people out walking with and without dogs plus a lot of bikes, great at the moment as it's sunny and dry plus it feels great to get out in spring time after 6 months of cabin fever.

The difference to normal seemed to be a steep reduction in car numbers and hardly any vapour trails in the sky and I did wonder if a slower pace of life or winding the clock back could actually be a good thing 
The world has got itself in one massive hurry and ultimately it just adds to stress and doesn't do anyone any good but the inch by inch advance of progress isn't necessarily progress once you stand back and look at it

[freeze44]

The difference to normal seemed to be a steep reduction in car numbers and hardly any vapour trails in the sky and I did wonder if a slower pace of life or winding the clock back could actually be a good thing 
The world has got itself in one massive hurry and ultimately it just adds to stress and doesn't do anyone any good but the inch by inch advance of progress isn't necessarily progress once you stand back and look at it

I'm crap at DIY and been banned from it! 

Agree about the pace of life  Kinda reminds me of that scene in Shawshank Redemption when the old guy is let out!

[Blackpool Rock]

I'm crap at DIY and been banned from it! 

Agree about the pace of life  Kinda reminds me of that scene in Shawshank Redemption when the old guy is let out!

I actually watched that at the weekend while at a loose end, spooky 
That's the line about the world has got itself into a big hurry and i've used it a few times before but well spotted 

PS I'm with you on the DIY too 

[winkywanky]

Just wondering what effect the current situation is having on life where you are?

I've seen lots of people painting fences, sometimes in odd colours (the blue the worst to me imo!) and might lead to a general tidy and smarten up!

I've cleared my garage out, but the tip will be closed? Bonfires ok though?! Am I getting very dull very quickly?   

My next move is some home based sports maybe! That includes checking the neighbours out  Call me Michael Payne, a nosey neighbour!

Ideas to things to do? What keeps the retired busy??! Don't want to end up wanking all the time! 

Curently I are be mainly wanking on alternate days, walking a lot, riding a bike a lot, cutting my grass the first time this year (only just dried out after all the rain), pruning a fruit tree, washing my car.

I'm superfit and I'd be a fucking-machine, but nowhere to pump! 

Next is the dreaded painting and spring clean  .

[Moby Dick]

I got an email from Graham Bell this morning apologising B&Q stores remain closed Today.
It’s understandable since he has to protect his coffin dodging workforce
I really fancied painting a few ceilings but hey ho, just gunna sit in the garden in my speedos watching the grass grow.

[freeze44]

I got an email from Graham Bell this morning apologising B&Q stores remain closed Today.
It’s understandable since he has to protect his coffin dodging workforce
I really fancied painting a few ceilings but hey ho, just gunna sit in the garden in my speedos watching the grass grow.

Do they deliver MD? What colours you going for?

Speedos in this weather! You not cold? 

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[winkywanky]

I got an email from Graham Bell this morning apologising B&Q stores remain closed Today.
It’s understandable since he has to protect his coffin dodging workforce
I really fancied painting a few ceilings but hey ho, just gunna sit in the garden in my speedos watching the grass grow.

Paint delivery from Amazon?

[winkywanky]

Do they deliver MD? What colours you going for?

Speedos in this weather! You not cold? 

Hidden Image/Members Only

I've heard of budgie-smugglers, those are sparrow-smugglers  .

[redveee]

I really fancied painting a few ceilings but hey ho,

I was hoping to employ a few ceiling checkers and ask them if my bedroom ceiling had any cracks in it but that won't be happening now. Guess it means I've now got time to sort out the boxes properly from when I moved into my new flat recently. In the past when I was at work a lot of jobs in the flat involved the use of one of these 

External Link/Members Only

[Moby Dick]

 
Warm enough when the sun is shining

Hidden Image/Members Only

[PatMacGroin]

I got an email from Graham Bell this morning apologising B&Q stores remain closed Today.
It’s understandable since he has to protect his coffin dodging workforce
I really fancied painting a few ceilings but hey ho, just gunna sit in the garden in my speedos watching the grass grow.

Screwfix are delivering. And accepting click and collect for "essential" products. Not sure how they define essential. Didn't realise they sold ventilators.

[Moby Dick]

Screwfix are delivering. And accepting click and collect for "essential" products. Not sure how they define essential. Didn't realise they sold ventilators.

Thanks but I’m in no rush for DIY. Happy to lounge about in the sun again today.
Got another email from Graham saying B&Q is now open for home essentials.
Contactless Click and collect to an allocated parking zone and they will bring items to your car.
They are working on home delivery.
Stores are closed for browsing and purchasing.

[freeze44]

Thanks but I’m in no rush for DIY. Happy to lounge about in the sun again today.
Got another email from Graham saying B&Q is now open for home essentials.
Contactless Click and collect to an allocated parking zone and they will bring items to your car.
They are working on home delivery.
Stores are closed for browsing and purchasing.

Good to know MD  My mower packed up and nowt else to do so will get busy in the garden when get supplies. Not got the balls to expose my milky white body though 

[Happylad]

I`ve built a new set of cold frames to accommodate the excess from my overflowing greenhouse, potted up all the begonias and dahlia tubers, serviced both my mowers and my chainsaws, planted my seed potatoes and sown my broad beans, and mowed the lawns.  It`s having to cook my own meals and do my own washing up that really bugs me.

[winkywanky]

I`ve built a new set of cold frames to accommodate the excess from my overflowing greenhouse, potted up all the begonias and dahlia tubers, serviced both my mowers and my chainsaws, planted my seed potatoes and sown my broad beans, and mowed the lawns.  It`s having to cook my own meals and do my own washing up that really bugs me.

Servicing your lawnmowers, planting your seed potatoes, sowing your broad beans, mowing your lawn.

I'm thinking that subconciously your fertile mind is still on punting, and that's a good thing 

Even the reference to 'washing up  afterwards 

[freeze44]

I`ve built a new set of cold frames to accommodate the excess from my overflowing greenhouse, potted up all the begonias and dahlia tubers, serviced both my mowers and my chainsaws, planted my seed potatoes and sown my broad beans, and mowed the lawns.  It`s having to cook my own meals and do my own washing up that really bugs me.

Could you tell me how to service my petrol mower Happylad? It's blowing out smoke! Any help for the cack handed be great!

And don't worry am not a relative but do hope you doing ok mate! 

[Happylad]

Could you tell me how to service my petrol mower Happylad? It's blowing out smoke! Any help for the cack handed be great!

And don't worry am not a relative but do hope you doing ok mate! 

Depends on whether your engine is 2stroke or 4 stroke.  If it`s 2 stroke you`ve probably mixed either too much, or wrong grade of oil in the petrol or the choke needs adjusting; if it`s petrol then (a) if its white smoke probably your choke needs adjusting, (b) if it`s blue then either you`ve mixed oil in the petrol or if not that then you may need new piston rings.

But I`m not a mechanic, and my 4 stroke mower is a 50 year old Qualcast, and my 2 stroke a 20 year old cheapie rotary, so I`m probably way behind the times.

As I`ve bugger all else to do I`m also available for gardening advice.

[Happylad]

P.S. If you`ve not changed the plug for a couple of years it might be a good idea to buy it a new one

[freeze44]

Depends on whether your engine is 2stroke or 4 stroke.  If it`s 2 stroke you`ve probably mixed either too much, or wrong grade of oil in the petrol or the choke needs adjusting; if it`s petrol then (a) if its white smoke probably your choke needs adjusting, (b) if it`s blue then either you`ve mixed oil in the petrol or if not that then you may need new piston rings.

But I`m not a mechanic, and my 4 stroke mower is a 50 year old Qualcast, and my 2 stroke a 20 year old cheapie rotary, so I`m probably way behind the times.

As I`ve bugger all else to do I`m also available for gardening advice.

  Cheers will try the choke as white smoke from a petrol mower

[winkywanky]

This also means a new Pope has been appointed, so perhaps a reason to celebrate.

[Moby Dick]

I`ve built a new set of cold frames to accommodate the excess from my overflowing greenhouse, potted up all the begonias and dahlia tubers, serviced both my mowers and my chainsaws, planted my seed potatoes and sown my broad beans, and mowed the lawns.  It`s having to cook my own meals and do my own washing up that really bugs me.

Fuckin hell, You must get up early.
I’d be a happy lad if I’d done all that.
I’ve had five coffees and a wank, or was it one coffee and five wanks? 
Dunno, losing track of time, waiting for me sock to dry a little bit.

 

[freeze44]

This also means a new Pope has been appointed, so perhaps a reason to celebrate.

  ok will bless this neighbour hood if this fecking mower gets going and forgive you all your sins....once you have confessed them all!!

[winkywanky]

You are guaranteed a lush green lawn my son, whether that's because it's a miracle, or whether it's because we've had so much fucking rain is anybody's guess    .

[workinallweek]

 funny how we would fill the free time with service providers now we get excited about painting

[winkywanky]

Well with all this time off from punting, it doesn't matter if 'the painters are in'  .

[Happylad]

Fuckin hell, You must get up early.
I’d be a happy lad if I’d done all that.
I’ve had five coffees and a wank, or was it one coffee and five wanks? 
Dunno, losing track of time, waiting for me sock to dry a little bit.

 

Always a good idea to take your socks off before you wank unless you have a bucket handy.

[winkywanky]

As the old saying goes, fill your boots (especially if you happen to be wearing Wellingtons in the garden).

[Happylad]

As the old saying goes, fill your boots (especially if you happen to be wearing Wellingtons in the garden).

The angle of deflection required to "fill my boots" if I`m wearing them might result in serious damage to my person, whereas I can usually hit the bucket from a couple of yards away.

[winkywanky]

I have to say, that's very good at your age HL, just make sure you don't kick the bucket while you're doing so    .

[Happylad]

Reason should have told you that if I should even attempt to kick a bucket standing two yards away at the moment of emission in a sitting or standing wank, the chances of said emission hitting the said bucket at the same time would be so infinitesimal as to be totally unconsiderable.

I can only assume that today your disassociate personalities are Messrs. Laurel and Hardy having an "off day"

[winkywanky]

Oh dear HL, having an attack of the grumps are we?

Never mind, I shan't bother again and then you needn't worry yourself with it.

[freeze44]

Depends on whether your engine is 2stroke or 4 stroke.  If it`s 2 stroke you`ve probably mixed either too much, or wrong grade of oil in the petrol or the choke needs adjusting; if it`s petrol then (a) if its white smoke probably your choke needs adjusting, (b) if it`s blue then either you`ve mixed oil in the petrol or if not that then you may need new piston rings.

Thanks happylad and following your advice and also cleaning the spark plug I'm back in action 

My lawn looking like this now! well not quite but you get my drift!

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[Happylad]

You will definitely need a new spark plug by next spring, so buy one now to be ready.
And I hope that you`re going to compost all those lovely grass cuttings.

[Bogof60]

Thanks happylad and following your advice and also cleaning the spark plug I'm back in action 

My lawn looking like this now! well not quite but you get my drift!

Hidden Image/Members Only

What are you doing in my back yard 

[sparkus]

Screwfix are delivering. And accepting click and collect for "essential" products. Not sure how they define essential. Didn't realise they sold ventilators.

I remember when a Screwfix delivery meant something else entirely...

[Happylad]

Up until now I have tended to treat this compulsory isolation of "at risk" people with some amusement, and I have complied but with the feeling that it isn`t really mean me.

However, a few days ago, realising the the larder was becoming somewhat depleted I attempted to arrange for Home Delivery from a Supermarket, but found that not only that one, but all the others also, either "had no more slots available" or were not taking any more registrations.
Nothing daunted I drove to my nearest Supermarket, parked my car, got a trolley and tottered over to join the queue to enter. There was some whispering among those in front of me and then the Doorkeeper in charge marched over and told me I could not go in and must leave immediately, and when I refused and asked why he said that it was illegal for me to be out, and then spoke into his communicator and asked them to call the Police.
Needless to say, I didn`t wish to waste the time of our hard pressed Constabulary,so I buggered off.

As my nearest son lives over 60 miles away and both he and his wife are working full time in vital jobs I rang a neighbour and mentioned the problem to her and asked if she could add my requirements to her next shopping list; she asked what they were, I told her, and she replied that she already needed to buy those for her own family of 5, and that sales of them were restricted to 2 per person, meaning that she would need to make a special trip just for mine on top of two trips for her own family.  As she runs a small business from her home I could understand her reluctance and apologised for asking her.

I suppose that I could pester all my neighbours in turn, and probably get a similar response from them but somehow that doesn`t appeal to me.

So...WHAT THE HELL DO I DO NOW?

[freeze44]

Up until now I have tended to treat this compulsory isolation of "at risk" people with some amusement, and I have complied but with the feeling that it isn`t really mean me.

However, a few days ago, realising the the larder was becoming somewhat depleted I attempted to arrange for Home Delivery from a Supermarket, but found that not only that one, but all the others also, either "had no more slots available" or were not taking any more registrations.
Nothing daunted I drove to my nearest Supermarket, parked my car, got a trolley and tottered over to join the queue to enter. There was some whispering among those in front of me and then the Doorkeeper in charge marched over and told me I could not go in and must leave immediately, and when I refused and asked why he said that it was illegal for me to be out, and then spoke into his communicator and asked them to call the Police.
Needless to say, I didn`t wish to waste the time of our hard pressed Constabulary,so I buggered off.

As my nearest son lives over 60 miles away and both he and his wife are working full time in vital jobs I rang a neighbour and mentioned the problem to her and asked if she could add my requirements to her next shopping list; she asked what they were, I told her, and she replied that she already needed to buy those for her own family of 5, and that sales of them were restricted to 2 per person, meaning that she would need to make a special trip just for mine on top of two trips for her own family.  As she runs a small business from her home I could understand her reluctance and apologised for asking her.

I suppose that I could pester all my neighbours in turn, and probably get a similar response from them but somehow that doesn`t appeal to me.

So...WHAT THE HELL DO I DO NOW?

That sounds shit happylad!

Stupid of the supermarket to do that! If they felt that strongly why not take your details and arrange a delivery!

There will be volunteers around and don't know if you do social media but bound to be something on there. If my mum called (and she lives a fair way away) I would do a search and contact a local group who will help am sure.

Also, do you have a local corner shop? A lot of those are doing local deliveries now for those in need.

Hope you get sorted soon 

[sparkus]

Happylad, it's my understanding that very high risk and vulnerable people like yourself are being taken care of by the authorities directly. I think you need to speak to your council social services (I don't know where you live but in two London Boroughs I know of elderly relatives who have). There should be an advice line on your council website.

[Strawberry]

That sounds shit happylad!

Stupid of the supermarket to do that! If they felt that strongly why not take your details and arrange a delivery!

There will be volunteers around and don't know if you do social media but bound to be something on there. If my mum called (and she lives a fair way away) I would do a search and contact a local group who will help am sure.

Also, do you have a local corner shop? A lot of those are doing local deliveries now for those in need.

Hope you get sorted soon 

Really sorry and this is a problem especially if some or many not-as-at-risk become symptomatic.

I would recommend looking into independent shops, many having lost footfall and responding to demand are home delivering. Even small tea and coffee merchants as well as the Eco-refill type, farm shops, closed restaurants making ready meals.

[sparkus]

External Link/Members Only

[sparkus]

Happylad, just seen that one council will soon be contacting all over 70s to ask if they're self isolating so help may soon be at hand but as I say, won't do any harm to contact them yourself. Your GP should have anyway.

[Happylad]

Many thanks for the advice. When I tried ringing the Council on Friday I was told by a machine that I was number 75 in the queue, so I think I`ll drive over to the Council Offices and sit on the doorstep until I get some attention There is no corner shop - just a butcher who`s closed down for the duration and a Co-op Convenience store which has had nothing but empty shelves for the last fortnight (THEY let me in, but they`ve got nothing to sell).  The nearest Supermarket is 10 miles away, so you will appreciate the problem.

I wouldn`t starve - I still have plenty of potatoes and frozen peas, beans carrots and apples from my last year`s harvest, but the tea doesn`t taste the same without milk and the Single Malt Scotch is almost down to the last bottle.

[Doc Holliday]

Being in the store is certainly not wise and against all advice but as shopping for essentials is one of the exempt reasons for leaving home, I'm not sure you were actually doing anything 'illegal' despite your age/health?

Did you receive the letter saying you were in the vulnerable category? There is also this External Link/Members Only