External Link/Members OnlyOk so this is a long review and is both fluffy and gross, so has something in it to offend everyone. But I’ve just come back from the wildest, filthiest and in many ways most remarkable evening of my life and I hope it will be of some interest to fellow punters.
So, we meet in the pub and chat for about 20 minutes. Lindsey has brought, as promised, a suitcase heavy with materiel for the forthcoming campaign and looks, as always, stunning. Her long hair has been dyed black and perfectly frames her pale face. She’s drinking (this will be important later) cider. We talk about what she’s been up to, which as readers of this forum are aware, is a very great deal, and drift into my kvetching about the scene.
“I never talk with anyone else like this,” she only very slightly exasperatedly says, “you shouldn’t overanalyse things.”
“It’s funny,” I say, “that when people say “over-analyse” they just mean analyse things they’d rather not think about.”
What I’m over-analysing is, I suppose, my anxieties about my ability, one blue pill notwithstanding, to perform. Really good sex is spontaneous, not over-determined, how can you force arousal etc. And the more we talk the less likely arousal is to happen. We could just as pleasantly spend the evening chatting. Surely.
We leave to get some prosecco and someone recognises Lindsey so I swiftly leave the pub with her suitcase and wait outside. She reappears and is grateful for my tact.
“I’m wearing the butt plug,” she says. I’d asked her to.
I feel down between her cheeks and sure enough, there it is. Her long legs look gorgeous as she strides along, as tall as me. Perhaps there are more interesting ways of spending the evening.
On the way to the hotel, we talk about the difference between male and female arousal and I feel again for the plug. Lindsey flashes her eyes at me.
“Why don’t I take the butt plug out in the lift and put in the anal hook? I’ve got it in my bag.”
She dives into her bag and pulls out of it a brutal-looking steel hook, on a chain.
“Then you can lead me down the corridor with it, like you said.”
“Now I’m getting hard,” I say. “Feel it.”
Her hand’s on my cock. “So you are.”
At the hotel, a family is getting in the right hand lift so we decide on the whole probably better not to use that one. Our empty one arrives.
No sooner are we in it than Lindsey pulls her skimpy red knickers aside and, with some effort, extracts a solid metal butt plug from her arse. It’s very heavy. As the lift goes up she takes it from me and gets out the anal hook and with a bit of effort it’s in. I pull on the chain to start fucking her arse with the hook. She groans. Level 8.
And so the evening proper starts with Lindsay’s arse on a chain at one end and me at the other, occasionally yanking on it to fuck her, as we slowly walk to my room. Tall pale beauty and owner. Something like that. As I unlock the door she turns to meet my eyes, and it’s both a challenge and an open invitation. This is a girl who has refrained from wanking for two days (prior text messages) and is, it appears, dripping for a fuck.
I throw her face down on the bed. Tear my clothes off. I dive between her arse cheeks and lick around the hook, then grab hold of the chain again to keep fucking her. Then lick her pussy. Her arse gets slapped. She’s struggling to remove her top and bra.
Then I throw myself down on the bed next to her and we start kissing, only broken by her moans as I pull as hard as I can on the chain. My cock is rigid. I grab hold of her knickers and pull them hard too, so they can fuck her cunt. I pull hard enough to hear them start to rip but they hold.
Lindsey now wants my cock and it disappears in her mouth. She goes deeper. I bunch up her hair in my fist and force her head down and my cock in as far as it can go, till I feel her throat opening.
No-one face-fucks like Lindsey. I’m being brutal with my cock because she wants me to be, mercilessly forcing it down to the last millimetre. She comes up for air, loud gasping and my cock glistening and coated, then I force her down on it again, arching my back into her face.
Then she goes down to my balls, squirreling down the bed so she’s lying between my legs. Then she goes lower, and it’s clear she wants my arse. Her tongue finds my hole and drives deep in, like she’s famished, and searches in as far as it can go. And licking around. I pull my legs back so she can rim me deeper. It is fucking fantastic.
I am now dangerously turned on. I think I can control it, but I know I’m near the edge. Then I can see I’m starting to spunk as the first then the second jet leaves my cock. O fuck. So I grab Lindsey (probably by the hair) to get what remains. Not much, probably, but as she swallows my cock I can feel some more, equally strong jets spunk down her throat. My cock is deep in her mouth as I spunk and spunk and spunk. Fuck. As before, I’m ramming her mouth as far as I can and she starts quite seriously gagging on it. I don’t let up and there’s a fairly big gag and she falls back, exhausted. My cock is coated in my spunk, Lindsey’s phlegm, and some of the cider that we shared, more innocently, earlier.
Fuck. Ing. Hell.
I'm not into girls puking, not even in porn. But Lindsey is more than ok with it, she likes it. I guess if you’re into gagging then puking is only the next stage, and always a danger. She’s (typically) concerned that I’m not grossed out by it. I’m not. Fuck, we were trying for maximum filth and we achieved it. My main worry is it’s only 10 minutes into 2 hours and I’ve just cum. And here is a girl who hasn’t been properly fucked yet.
We lie and talk and kiss. Very soon (combination of viagra and stunning beauty, not much to do with me) I’m hard again, and it’s time to go down on Lindsey properly. I turn her over and get between her legs. About 10 minutes of gorgeous oral. Lindsey getting more and more turned on, bucking and writhing, “O fuck…o fuck” – ing, then I drive her over the edge. Lovely to look up at her prone body as I do it, stroking her small breasts.
She folds her beautiful hands over her pussy after she’s come, in a touchingly/ apparently innocent gesture. Which means I can rub my cock over her enfolded hands while I move up to kiss her.
"I really like being fucked after I've cum. My pussy is so...."
So it’s time to fuck her. Missionary. On with the prophylactic and, gently to start, fucking. Then it builds and builds into a pounding. I hold her legs up so I can thrust down more powerfully. This seems to go on for hours. Hard and fast. Only my exhaustion makes me stop. Not Biggus Dickus, maybe, but Bigenoughus Dickus certainly.
“I want to to be spit roasted!” Lindsay says, with a glee like it’s Christmas. But how? Well, you get a purple dildo with a suction pad, and stick it to the mirror. She backs onto that and starts fucking it, while you feed her your cock, standing in front of her. You slap her face with your glistening cock then force it down her throat. You lean over and grasp her fantastic rump in both hands because you think she’s not fucking herself hard enough, and force her back and forth on the dildo harder, in time with your thrusts in her mouth. Then you lie beneath her with your cock pointing up and say “ I don’t know how we’ll do this.” So, Lindsey, nothing daunted, repositions dildo on the wall and bends down almost to the floor to take your cock. Her long legs are spread very wide at the back.
We collapse on the floor for a breather.
“I like being on the floor,” she says.
“Me too.”
“You should always have sex on the floor. Or in a garage. Or a desk. Or a shop. Not in a bed. A bed’s for sleeping in.”
We kiss and cuddle and chat on the floor.
Then Lindsey decides she wants to be fucked in the shower, and she wants to be fucked in the arse. And she knows I’ve never done anal before. But on the way there (after some glorious hard doggy first in the mirror then with Lindsey keeling on the floor and laying her top half over the bed), somehow, I want to fuck her mouth again and we go into pure Rocco Siffredi territory (up to a point, ahem) with me pinning Lindsey’s head on the edge of the bed, so she’s squatting down, while I face-fuck and cock-slap her as hard as I can, coating her face with precum and spit. She fingers her pussy and feeds herself the juice to add to the mixture. And I spit in her mouth to complete the cocktail. Her make up has run, her face is flushed and hot and glistening, she looks deliriously drunk on pleasure and beautiful.
So the shower. She tells me off for being crap about the controls, and kvetching that it’s too hot (delaying tactics, probably – but the water was too fucking hot) and then, when the temperature is right, turns round and slightly hoiks her bottom up, fingers herself, then gets hold of my cock to guide me in. It’s a small shower, and she is bent over. I can feel some resistance then bit by bit, I enter Lindsey’s tight arsehole and start fucking her. Slowly then a bit harder. It’s fucking filthy, so I ram harder and force her very hard up against the shower wall. Her face is now flat against the wall, and her long wet hair is in chaos round her face, neck and shoulders. She looks unbelievably beautiful. And filthy. And standing over her, looking down, I can see her whole glorious body: her long, strong legs braced against my cock (as well as falling arse-over-tit out of the shower), her hands pressing against the wall.
I ought to’ve cum but didn’t. Who cares.
Lindsey then got out the doxy, to make herself come again. First by laying flat out on the bed with me seated behind her, then she said “I want to feel you behind me” and so squatted over me so I could finger her cunt (“not my arse”), rub my cock over her arse cheeks and kiss her long back while she brought herself off.
And lastly, she wanted to be face fucked with her head over the side of the bed because it’s the best position. And because she likes it hard, I gave it hard to her – sometimes fingering/ kissing her pussy, sometimes not. Well, I thought I’d learned about her gag reflex by now, but it turns out I hadn’t, because after one particularly deep thrust, the rest of the cider re-emerged and very generously spattered itself all over her upside-down head. She was absolutely fucking drenched.
Me:“O fuck I’m so sorry!”
Lindsey:(Deep breathing, laughing) “ Don’t be. It’s fucking hot!”
(But she did have to have another shower, and the towels were pretty wet by this time. Stern note to Travelodge is in order.)
So followed more chat about the grossness, or otherwise, of puking. Then a curry (thank Christ we hadn’t eaten first…) then our farewells.
There was more but this review is too long already.
It seems fitting that Lindsey should have the last word. I woke up to a very complimentary text from her to which I replied saying I was lost for words. Her reply was: “Fucking fantastic”? How about those words? Last night was utterly and beautifully filthy. Really enjoyed letting myself go.xxx”
