The dreaded Fart

[Neal69]

So there I was being treated to a long slow BJ by a regular and the dreaded rumblings in the lower regions started.

Now the reason this one is a regular is because she is totally unpredictable in the sex department and the only thing I can guarantee is that I will enjoy it.  I have no idea when or if the shagging will start as she will sometimes edge me with  BJ and then shag me or just bring me off with the BJ.

Anyway I did think it was undiplomatic to fart when she was down there  so I tightened the old nipsy to stave off the urge praying she was not going to initiate anal play on me. 

Well she did eventually release to old boy long enough to rubber him up but then jumped on board in Reverse Cowgirl 

Well you can see where this is going 

I must say that I excelled myself in my self control and refrained from letting off a rip snorter right in her face and concluded the session without embarrassing myself  Maybe now you can see why I did not post this in the "Most Embarrassing Thing ...." Thread.

Anyway this did have the most surprising benefit. Concentrating on not blowing Love Puffs at her did distract me from the sight of my cock playing hide and seek and rather prolonged the session so when the inevitable happened ( orgasm not the other) it was rather intense. 

Now I am not recommending a diet of baked beans as an aphrodisiac but sometimes the most unexpected things lead to a great punt.

I even managed to control myself long enough to make my exit with my dignity intact but then announced myself to the entire street.   

So if anyone was waiting for "That Text" and saw a bloke walking down the street letting out a great big fart then I have been rumbled 

N

[madmania]

Good story man, probably best you didn't let rip directly in her face might have put a dampener on her enthusiasm

I have a colostomy bag and so have no sphincter there - the number of times I've started shitting let alone farting mid shag doesnt bear thinking about.

Having to excuse yourself to the bathroom really does kill the mood lol. At least there is no smell so theres always a silver lining 

[Horizontal pleasures]

I thought at first YOU were the old fart ....

[nigel4498]

I thought at first YOU were the old fart ....

Thought that was you HP 

[PleadInsanity]

Good job Neal, I think thats quite a skill to hold a fart while jetting off

[zootalors]

I thought this was going to end with "Sorry,I can't take another 68 of those"

[Hertsgent]

Great story Neal....have to say I always try to be very attentive to my diet leading up to a punt, I have a continuing nightmare about if I would ever need a turn-out at a WGs place, fortunately has not come true .....yet....

[sireel]

this did have the most surprising benefit

By holding in the fart, you were probably performing kegel exercises

[pewpewpew]

I always get the need to dart when getting a blowjob. I think I might just be a bit of a bastard

[Vivago]

Hilarious. So you would recommend a plate of baked beans as an effective treatment for PE.