It reminds me of the company advert at Vue cinemas. Five fucking minutes repeatedly telling me, I quote, “This is not a cinema...”. The ad then claims it is the front row at a Rolling Stones concert, the best seat at the opera, and various other crap. Of course it’s a fucking cinema.
They repeat their mantra often enough telling you they are your temporary girlfriend, your pornstar experience, your relaxation specialist, your wonderful companion, whatever you want them to be, or the most mindlowing experience of your life. But they’re not. They’re common prostitutes. Paid to open their legs (and maybe grunt a bit).
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Posted on my iPhone. — which isn’t a phone, apparently it’s an organiser, a thing to spend more time with than a best friend, a camera, a diary. A phone, like prostitute, costs about a tenner.
You have pretty much summed up one of the things that annoy me most in life, the total over hyping of everything. Every film and every musical you see is rated "five out of five, unmissable" when you are actually lucky if you leave and think "that was OK" and instantly forget about it. It is almost as if amazing is the new mediocre.
I was at Heathrow airport waiting for a flight and the only place I could eat was Heston Blumenthal's Perfectionists’ Café. Here is the description from the menu
"The Perfectionists’ Café special beer batter is aerated through a siphon to create the lightest, crunchiest texture and, for that real smell of the ‘chippie’, served with an atomiser of malt vinegar pickled onion juice - bottled at source!
EXTRAORDINARY FISH & CHIPS £16.50
Battered or breaded day boat Cornish fish, chips, mushy peas with a hint of mint and tartar sauce."
It was shit, no better than the sort of birds eye frozen crap you would buy from Tesco's and sling in the oven. The atomiser of malt vinegar was one of those little bottles you buy from b&q for 99p to spray plants and I left feeling ripped off. If you want an example of how utterly stupid and gullible people are look at his Fat Duck videos on Youtube where people are paying £500 for dinner and wine (assuming they are lucky enough to get picked after the three month waiting list). No matter how crap the food you are eating it will be described as "home made", "succulent", "hand prepared", "triple cooked", all designed to make you think this is some sort of lifestyle experience rather than just eating food prepared in a factory and reheated.
It's everything in life, advertisers try and pursuade us how amazing our lives would be if we purchased their products and how much cooler and attractive it would make us. Facebook is full of people trying to pursuade everyone else how amazing their life is due to the holiday/night out etc. they are having. The reality is the people staying in and watching Netflix are having a much better time.
I have also been test driving new cars recently, and no matter what the adverts say they are all pretty much the same. None of these cars are going to improve my life and make me more attractive to women. In actual fact all they are going to do is drain my wallet and cause me more problems in life as I have to worry about where I park it and people damaging it. I actually got back in my 12 year old car after each test drive thinking it is not that bad and will save me hundreds of pounds a month a stress if I keep it.
And as you say the same thing applies to hookers, it's not a mindblowing experience worth £350 an hour, it is a woman letting you have access to her stinky meathole in return for money. No matter how much you hype it up, it's just blowing your load in some woman's vagina just like 1000 other men have done. She doesn't like you, in actual fact she thinks you are pathetic and just wants you money and to get rid of you as quickly as possible.
