Meeting the wife directly after sex party?

[Mikeallen]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

[daviemac]

Just do it, what can possibly go wrong.

[nikmeister]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

If you are that paranoid you might wanna give the party a miss. You may not smell of perfume or scent but mentally you'll be on edge throughout and your behaviour may raise alarms/concerns.

I wouldn't go if I was in this situation

[RandomGuy99]

Just do it, what can possibly go wrong.

Exactly

Sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.

[Mikeallen]

Mmm.. I think I let my penis rule my head. On reflection it’ll probably be a disaster - so I think I’ll just save myself the headache and the £160. Thanks for confirming that my idea wasn’t really the best

[Fuzzyduck]

I get the thrill. I've been with a GF in other cities and agreed to separate for a short while to do our own shopping but went for a punt instead with a local.

I think it partly depends where your wife expects you to be in the time before you meet. Would she expect you to be freshly showered with unfamiliar shower gel? Personally I'd leave the party early to chill out a bit, maybe go have a pint or something.

[Billy no mates]

Mmm.. I think I let my penis rule my head. On reflection it’ll probably be a disaster - so I think I’ll just save myself the headache and the £160. Thanks for confirming that my idea wasn’t really the best

I think it would be a terrible call to make.

If you’re gonna punt behind the wife’s back ensure you have no risks or grey areas.

[Logitech]

I get the thrill. I've been with a GF in other cities and agreed to separate for a short while to do our own shopping but went for a punt instead with a local.

I think it partly depends where your wife expects you to be in the time before you meet. Would she expect you to be freshly showered with unfamiliar shower gel? Personally I'd leave the party early to chill out a bit, maybe go have a pint or something.

This is fantastic - about ten years ago I was Christmas shopping with the girlfriend and agreed to part shortly to visit different shops. Suffice to say I was lucky to see a well reviewed girl offering a very well priced blow and go in the vicinity. Fast forward 30 minutes and we’re back together browsing the shops and I’ve just been sucked dry.

[Stevelondon]

Don’t listen to the party poopers. Life is far too short.

Go for it.

In fact ask one of the party girls if she would like to go with you and meet the wife. 😂

[PumpDump]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

Go for it. Bring you own shower gel (Leave it behind at the party). The riskiness makes it all the more fun.

[PumpDump]

I get the thrill. I've been with a GF in other cities and agreed to separate for a short while to do our own shopping but went for a punt instead with a local.

And technically do your own shopping is exactly what you did 

[PumpDump]

I think it would be a terrible call to make.

If you’re gonna punt behind the wife’s back ensure you have no risks or grey areas.

There is always a risk. The guys who think they have eliminated risk drop their guard and get caught.

[superchamp]

Just do it, what can possibly go wrong.

Bumping into the wife at the party?   

[advent2016]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

This is so frivolous. You seem to want to get caught.  “You’re not doing this for the hunting, are you?”

What if your wife was at the same party  / another party ?

[myothernameis]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

What can go wrong, I guess there potential for a lot of things to go wrong

[daviemac]

Bumping into the wife at the party?   

Not if he took her along. 

[Jonestown]

Could be one trip to London you'll remember for the rest of your life.

[scutty brown]

FFS take the wife to the party, pimp her out and do a bit of swapping.
She'll probably be glad of the change
With luck she'll get banged and buggered to her satisfaction while you can be a good hubby and watch and cheer her on

[Hornydevil666]

You will Defo not relax and enjoy yourself as much and you will proby be clock watching too to get finished 10 mins early to get cleaned up etc, give it a miss this time

[boardyhell]

and check your pockets for knickers

[TrampZ]

Why don’t you ask your wife if she would like to attend too, it might be nice to see her being pleasured by others 

[Davey80]

I’d say you’d be ok if you had a reason to have a small rucksack with you with your usual deoderant and identical shirt and jumper you could flip after a shower whilst avoiding any perfumed up ladies on the way out.

Otherwise I’d forget it!

[Bonker]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

I see many things wrong with your post. You asked for it...
An opportunity is just that, it can't be a maybe.
The expression is "a fly in the ointment",  qualifying it as only is incorrect.
10 minutes cannot be figurative.
It's not obvious that you will shower,  you mean "of course".
You're not slightly paranoid, you see a risk that she will smell the perfume.
You're not concerned, you're afraid of being find out.

erm... what did you ask me again?
Oh yes - you're a heartless prick and stupid to boot.
(Please don't take offence, just pulling your leg)

[Colston36]

Personally I'd like to meet her after she's been to one ...

[pythondan]

What would happen if the wife phones you mid-party to make some change to when you are meeting?

Assume you are hanging out the back of some saucy lady who is also entertaining other chaps with her mouth and hands. Do you ask everyone to keep quiet whilst you talk to her? If not what excuse do you use for not answering?

If you can solve that then a solution to the potential perfume issue would be to pop into Boots or similar and spray your self with some aftershave testers. You could then actively request your wife to sniff you 

[shagmore]

Doubt very much the WGs will have perfume on, I have not met any that wear it, as they know its not good for the punter to get caught smelling of other people perfume.
If by any chance they do, you can always say to your OH, that you called into one of the department stores looking for perfume for her, and had so many samples not such which one is which, then discuss different perfumes and get her one for Christmas - 2 birds one stone

[RedKettle]

The OP is perhaps the answer to the thread asking why mumsnet despise UKP!

[tazz]

2 hours of sex will leave you with a big smile on your face and preety tired. No way will your wife not realise you've been screwing. Ever thought of discussing swinging or escorts with the wife, its so common now.

[EUGENE TACKLEBERRY]

As said your behavior may be irratic, you will prob rush, forget summat, look hot an sweaty still and still smell of kebab an shame

My advice, don't, punt more responsibly

[Blackpool Rock]

As said your behavior may be irratic, you will prob rush, forget summat, look hot an sweaty still and still smell of kebab an shame

My advice, don't, punt more responsibly

Personally i'd not risk it but for some people they like the thrill of sailing close to the wind and get off on it, sort of like hiding in plain sight 

[Southernbloke]

Nearly got caught once myself. When the OH asked why I looked hot and flustered I just said that I had been shagging some hot bird for the last 90 minutes and I was a bit knackered . She said if you can’t come up with a better excuse than that for trying to buy me a birthday present covertly then don’t bother.
Just as well she reminded me as I’d forgotten that it was her birthday coming up

[GreyDave]

  Dont do it fix another day....

Last meet I did I could smell fanny on myself and my glasses as I waited for tube after a session ....Thank goodness the other half was away

I am reminded of the Muriels Wedding scene....girl crying .....I went t give him a blowjob and he had someone elses lipstick on it

[Blackpool Rock]

Nearly got caught once myself. When the OH asked why I looked hot and flustered I just said that I had been shagging some hot bird for the last 90 minutes and I was a bit knackered . She said if you can’t come up with a better excuse than that for trying to buy me a birthday present covertly then don’t bother.
Just as well she reminded me as I’d forgotten that it was her birthday coming up

[tynetunnel]

Dont do it fix another day....

Last meet I did I could smell fanny on myself and my glasses as I waited for tube after a session ....Thank goodness the other half was away

The last young lady I spent intimate time with, I could smell her fanny on my lips and face afterwards. Luckily when I got home the wife had already gone to bed!

[Markc]

To the OP l think most of us on here will tell you this a bad idea. Maybe go to a party or see a WG when you have more time.
A regular l see normally for about 3 hours at her house in a village nearby to where l live l always stop at a pub or a coffee house on the way back to catch my breath. I also make sure l get home before the wife gets home from school where she is a teacher to have a shower and freshen up.

[spiralnotebook]

Don’t know about Mikeallen I’d have thought Dave Allen would have been a more suitable posting name for this thread.

[HappyHarryIV]

some years ago I was visiting overseas, the GF was arriving in the late evening, but as I got there in the morning I had time to try 2 locals, one of which was about an hour before she landed.

Go for it, you only live once

[Marmalade]

Can you not tell when someone is fresh out of the shower (and for no apparent reason) …?

[shagmore]

Why don’t you ask your wife if she would like to attend too, it might be nice to see her being pleasured by others 

I must say that is a something I would love to do, but the OH is a bit of a prude, unless she has a secret life like me 

[B4bcock]

I must say that is a something I would love to do, but the OH is a bit of a prude, unless she has a secret life like me 

We don't find her at all prudish.  Whoops, I promised not to discuss her secret life. 

[Southernbloke]

We don't find her at all prudish.  Whoops, I promised not to discuss her secret life. 

Post a link 😆

[Hobbit]

Just do it, what can possibly go wrong.

I hope you're being sarcastic.

What could go wrong? Plenty!

Women are very good at picking these things up and even a strand of hair that is not his could end up leading him into all kinds of shit.

What I would suggest is this:

Have a shower before you meet the OH
Make sure there is no hair on you which is not yours. (Especially if you are bald)
Don't act nervous as it will look suspicious
Make sure there is no perfume on you or any marks of any kind
And finally...last but not least....... just hope for the best and pray!

[Doc Holliday]

Make sure there is no hair on you which is not yours. (Especially if you are bald)

Yes avoid blondes especially



Hidden Image/Members Only

[Chasingthedream]

Go for it. Life's too short.

[DastardlyDick]

We don't find her at all prudish.  Whoops, I promised not to discuss her secret life. 

It would be hilarious the OPs missus was one of the girls at this sex party and had been doing it for years without him knowing 

[Blackpool Rock]

It would be hilarious the OPs missus was one of the girls at this sex party and had been doing it for years without him knowing 

Yeah imagine getting to the party after it's already started and walking into a room to find your missus air tight 

[Abdhal]

I wouldn't be able to relax to enjoy it.
I would be clock watching, especially if it went on a bit longer. 
That's great if you have no plans, but you do.

[PumpDump]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

So come on OP, what did you decide, did you do it? Let us know.

[mrwhite]

I have a small window of opportunity to (maybe) visit a sex party when I’m next in London (I rarely get such opportunities). However the only fly in the ointment is that I’ll have to meet up with the wife, literally 10mins after it ends. Obviously I’ll shower at the end of the party, but I’m slightly paranoid she’ll smell the perfume/scent. Am I being a bit paranoid or is it a valid concern? Any thoughts?

Most (but not all SPs) avoid wearing perfume for that exact reason.
Why not get a bottle of your favourite aftershave and a small tester as well.  Keep the tester in your jacket pocket.
The day of the punt give yourself a liberal dousing of your favourite smell (so the wife knows you are wearing it) then after the punt (and a shower) you can use the tester just to top up the smell.

Alternatively - don't punt on a day you are supposed to be out with the wife!

[monkmarvey]

Slightly different one for me. My wife is dropping me at the station this morning so I can catch a train to London for a duo. If only she knew she was aiding and abetting my punting