Stinking Minge!

[winkywanky]

Oh, ffs, you guys. In 19-fucking-63, I thought I'd finished with Eng. Lit. 'O Level' exams.

Please spare me any more Literary Criticisms!!

 

I was 13yrs behind you HA   

[WASA38]

Oh, ffs, you guys. In 19-fucking-63, I thought I'd finished with Eng. Lit. 'O Level' exams.

Please spare me any more Literary Criticisms!!

Ah me, happy memories. In my case, though, 1953. Paradise Lost. A fitting metaphor for those of us of advanced years for whom Covid19 has , I fear, ended a joyous era of punting. 

[WASA38]

Now that is an effort of truly Wordsworthian proportions 

 

[Home Alone]

Aww c'mon, HA. Give the iterative, creative process a chance! I also want to see what happens to the cheese sandwich since OP seems reluctant to revisit.

Sorry, all; too much vino as the night went on!   

[dthompson88]

The OP reminds me of one of my first punts years ago.

WG was an early 20s blonde stunner, came to the door in sexy lingerie and stocking & heels. Followed her upstairs, staring at her peach of an arse all the way, I couldn't wait to get those lace kegs off her.

Into bedroom, took off bra to reveal nice perky tits... then dropped her pants, at first whiff I thought the room was just a bit stale. Then she handed me a bottle of coconut lotion, lay on her front and purred "massage me" and opened her legs...

The only way to describe it was as if a bin lorry had dumped it's entire load into the bedroom 

I've never smelled Sarstrumming; you know that Swedish fermented fish "delicacy" that's banned on airplanes for being too foul? Now I don't have to.   

Anyway, I quickly started applying loads of the coconut stuff to her fanny & arse to try and mask the stench, while she purred away oblivious. But all that did was mix smells; ending up with a pungent cocktail of sweet coconut & rotten mackerel. 

After several nauseating minutes of a bj, handjob & avoiding her Nether Regions of Rotting Doom, I made my excuses and left.

Fresh air never smelled so sweet, let me tell you.

[B4bcock]

I also want to see what happens to the cheese sandwich since OP seems reluctant to revisit.

Word on the street, Fuzzy, is that the cheese sandwich continued to reek havoc.   

[B4bcock]

Anyway, I quickly started applying loads of the coconut stuff to her fanny & arse to try and mask the stench, while she purred away oblivious. But all that did was mix smells; ending up with a pungent cocktail of sweet coconut & rotten mackerel. 

Sounds like this girl brought out the Jamie Oliver in you.   

[B4bcock]

Mind you, that was one hell of a mixing bowl.   

[unclepokey]

I was tempted to comment here as I simply could not imagine a guy giving a fanny some attention with no ill issues only to assume a different position and be repulsed. Only a total dog fart could account, I thought.

But these days I can't truly comment since I lot my sense of smell a couple of years ago for which the dog is grateful as I kick him less frequently.

[tynetunnel]

Some months back I had the ‘pleasure’ of meeting up with an SA girl in a hotel, and she was plainly much larger than her photos had indicated. By some margin. But I’d paid for the hotel, I’d got her allowance to give her, so I decided any hole is a goal, and that I’d have her the once.

I’d already told her that I love to give oral. So she was keen for the experience. I’d already had some fingers in, all nice and wet and so decided the time was right to move down and give her some tongue love. As I got there and went to send my tongue in, the stench hit me. I cannot begin to explain what it was like, as I have done everything possible to erase it from my memory. Luckily the nightmares have stopped now... but let me put it this was, I literally gagged! 

Shortly after this, having given her no oral whatsoever, in the time-honoured fashion of Sunday tabloid newspaper reporters, I made my excuses and left.

[Hobbit]

Some months back I had the ‘pleasure’ of meeting up with an SA girl in a hotel, and she was plainly much larger than her photos had indicated. By some margin. But I’d paid for the hotel, I’d got her allowance to give her, so I decided any hole is a goal, and that I’d have her the once.

I’d already told her that I love to give oral. So she was keen for the experience. I’d already had some fingers in, all nice and wet and so decided the time was right to move down and give her some tongue love. As I got there and went to send my tongue in, the stench hit me. I cannot begin to explain what it was like, as I have done everything possible to erase it from my memory. Luckily the nightmares have stopped now... but let me put it this was, I literally gagged! 

Shortly after this, having given her no oral whatsoever, in the time-honoured fashion of Sunday tabloid newspaper reporters, I made my excuses and left.

Many years ago I remember seeing this Irish SA girl, and she was average looking and in her 30s. Everything was going well until I decided to give her oral and straightaway it felt like I had entered Billingsgates fish market as it stunk so bad. I declined the offer of oral and she asked why and I said it tasted a bit salty and I am currently on a low salt diet.

[davidgood]

I have been lucky to only encounter whiffy minges on a few occasions and while I may continue podging I would be unlikely to give them the pleasure of my tounge.

However what I have experienced more of is whiffy bottys which is very off putting if you are in doggy position, especially if you are going to bugger them.

At my last party before Lockdown there was a plump young girl I had played with before. As she has short legs I thought it would be best to have her bent over the arm of a sofa. She assumed the position and I started podging but the whiff was so off putting I did not reach a satisfactory conclusion!

I am looking forward to getting back to parties again but I am likely to give those with that a girl in the line-up a miss. Although she is quite sweet and chatty and it might have been a one off bad day for her, so I might give her a second chance.

Regards,

davidgood

[Hobbit]

I have been lucky to only encounter whiffy minges on a few occasions and while I may continue podging I would be unlikely to give them the pleasure of my tounge.

However what I have experienced more of is whiffy bottys which is very off putting if you are in doggy position, especially if you are going to bugger them.

At my last party before Lockdown there was a plump young girl I had played with before. As she has short legs I thought it would be best to have her bent over the arm of a sofa. She assumed the position and I started podging but the whiff was so off putting I did not reach a satisfactory conclusion!

I am looking forward to getting back to parties again but I am likely to give those with that a girl in the line-up a miss. Although she is quite sweet and chatty and it might have been a one off bad day for her, so I might give her a second chance.

Regards,

davidgood

Maybe you could wear a mask to protect you from the smell. 

[davidgood]

Maybe you could wear a mask to protect you from the smell. 
[/quote]

It would have to be a gas mask and I have not had one since playing with them as a kid many many years ago.


Regards,

davidgood