Vivago back in Africa

[Vivago]

Well yesterday was one of those days one would like to completely expunge and erase from the memory banks.

Attempted mugging in the morning and then let down by my intended punt in the evening with no back up. My cup of sorrow overfloweth. Such are the trial and tribulations of an international punter.

[mradventures]

im sure you have other girls lined up

and yeah  at mugging, hopefully doesnt effect you to much.

get the next girl(s) you have to give you a big tight hug

[Happyjose]

Re Post 40: Hardly a gushing response Jose. Just a straight forward, uncomplicated statement of fact, something that your unhappy scrambled grey matter seems to find impossible to understand.
Keep on trucking Vivago! 

At least you haven’t tried (and failed) to use the quote function again 

Was wondering how to respond to this chump, then realised that other established members have already taken a look at his contributions and offered their own verdicts.

Here they are again. Enjoy 

the shit attitude you have.

you are too thick

The only plonker appearing in this thread is YOU   

.+1

[Vivago]

Ffs you are an irritating little fucker. You seem to have settled here on my blog thread with a wind up agenda and are as welcome here as a pork pie at a Bar Mitzvah. When are you going to fuck off and annoy someone else?

[Happyjose]

Ffs you are an irritating little fucker. You seem to have settled here on my blog thread with a wind up agenda and are as welcome here as a pork pie at a Bar Mitzvah. When are you going to fuck off and annoy someone else?

Sincere apologies

Are you charging for entry 

[Vivago]

Are you charging for entry 

What a knob

[winkywanky]

Well yesterday was one of those days one would like to completely expunge and erase from the memory banks.

Attempted mugging in the morning and then let down by my intended punt in the evening with no back up. My cup of sorrow overfloweth. Such are the trial and tribulations of an international punter.

To be honest, sounds like just any other ordinary day in London (or any other UK metropolis) these days 

[Happyjose]

What a knob

Oh, stop with the fake outrage

The whole purpose of this thread (and others you've posted) seems to be to tout your failing pay site

The more posts on here, the higher it appears in the latest post section, and the more potential marks see it

Don't blame me if nobody wants to pay to see your wrinkly old ball sack 

[Vivago]

How do you know that my ball bag is wrinkly? You been peeking. Naughty boy.

So your saying in essence that, by continually harping on about my supposedly failing website, you are promotIng it by keeping it in the public eye. Very naughty boy. Head1 will be slapping your bottom.

You might like to get your facts straight whilst you are applying salve to your sore botty. My site went live on the 19th September so is just over 2 months old. My blogs started almost 3 years ago. The only thread which post dates the launch of the blog site is this one.

You really are a complete moron, aren’t you?

[Happyjose]

How do you know that my ball bag is wrinkly? You been peeking. Naughty boy.

So your saying in essence that, by continually harping on about my supposedly failing website, you are promotIng it by keeping it in the public eye. Very naughty boy. Head1 will be slapping your bottom.

You might like to get your facts straight whilst you are applying salve to your sore botty. My site went live on the 19th September so is just over 2 months old. My blogs started almost 3 years ago. The only thread which post dates the launch of the blog site is this one.

You really are a complete moron, aren’t you?

No need to worry, Head1 has never had to warn me about abusing my membership of this very successful, free site

It's your sense of entitlement that seems to be getting you in trouble

I've contributed loads to UKP over the years so is it too much to expect a little free promotion in return?

and as for being a moron, which one of us tried to set up a pay site for gullible punters and failed? 

But if this is the quality of your comebacks, then all I can do is refer you to reply #57

If you feel compelled to respond further, just read it again 

.

[southcoastpunter]

Happyjose - i think you will find you are in a minority on this - maybe a minority of one but certainly a minority. Most of us welcome his contributions on here.

You have had your say, so .....Why not just let it go now.

[Happyjose]

Happyjose - i think you will find you are in a minority on this - maybe a minority of one but certainly a minority. Most of us welcome his contributions on here.

You have had your say, so .....Why not just let it go now.

Happy to let it go

This isn't about his contributions on here, it was about touting his own pay site, several times.

and from then I've responded to his replies

and I thought my reply 48 was quite sweet and conciliatory

He came back with abuse, so go figure

.

[Vivago]

  you are a sad, pathetic little man the way you go scurrying around looking for quotes to support your silly, pointless assertions. Note that I seldom use quotes which are in my opinion crutches for a lame brain such as you possess.

If I did need crutches for a feeble and delicate ego such as you apparently possess, I might merely look at all the accolades heaped on my blogs over the years that I have been writing them by other members of this site. They would probably fill several pages of this blog. How often have you been applauded by your peers either in real life or in this artificial environment? Ever?

So what exactly is your problem? Are you just merely inadequate or are you simply envious of someone else’s success. For make no bones about it,  your baseless assertion that my site is a failure, couldn’t be further from the truth.

[Vivago]

And that is my last word on the topic as I have assignations to arrange.

I suggest that you go get yourself some fanny too. I think you need it.

Badly.

 

[Happyjose]

you are a sad, pathetic little man the way you go scurrying around looking for quotes to support your silly, pointless assertions. Note that I seldom use quotes which are in my opinion crutches for a lame brain such as you possess.

If I did need crutches for a feeble and delicate ego such as you apparently possess, I might merely look at all the accolades heaped on my blogs over the years that I have been writing them by other members of this site. They would probably fill several pages of this blog. How often have you been applauded by your peers either in real life or in this artificial environment? Ever?

So what exactly is your problem? Are you just merely inadequate or are you simply envious of someone else’s success. For make no bones about it,  your baseless assertion that my site is a failure, couldn’t be further from the truth.

 

The reason you have a problem with quotes is they undo your argument

How can it be a silly pointless assertion when you have admitted using this site to tout your own pay site. The site owner had to delete touting posts of yours after you had already been warned

I've contributed loads to UKP over the years so is it too much to expect a little free promotion in return?

That's a prime example of the usefulness of quotes. Maybe you forgot you posted that? 

and I quite enjoy your blog posts, just not your touting. They're well-written and entertaining, though they should be viewed through the prism of objectivity - you obviously have a vested interest in promoting your own site, so a degree of embellishment might be expected. Your denial of facts here reinforces this

I have a history of calling out touts. If you have a problem with that complain to the management. Or if it's too much for you on here, why not spend your time in a quieter place, like your own site

again you help me out with your own admission:

the way things are going, I'll be lucky if I recoup my initial expenditure on the project.

why not settle the argument and show us the results when you run the worth of your own site through that 'analytical' website you previously quoted

Happy to be proved wrong......

.

[Steve2]

Change the record Jose 

[Happyjose]

Change the record Jose 

Yeah, even I'm bored with this

[fisherofsouls]

Haha keep 'em peeled Vivago mate

Getting on a plane to Sao Paulo tomorrow so I will be thinking of you !

[Vivago]

Haha keep 'em peeled Vivago mate

Getting on a plane to Sao Paulo tomorrow so I will be thinking of you !

Good man. Have a blast. São Paulo Chicas are the hottest of the hot.

[winkywanky]

One day...

and of course it's early summer over there now. Pretty girls in summer dresses and everything...

[Vivago]

why not settle the argument and show us the results when you run the worth of your own site through that 'analytical' website you previously quoted

Happy to be proved wrong......

.

I won’t show you financial data because that is none of your business and might be suggestive of self promotion but after only 2 months the bio-diversity over one week has to be of interest. Just goes to show that there are punters everywhere. By the way the Kenyan numbers were probably me using a test account but even I could not get around the rest of the places over a period of a week.    I would be interested in seeing UKP’s similar results which must be similar by a factor of 100.


Hidden Image/Members Only

[Vivago]

I should add that these stats are from Google Analytics not a website valuation company.

[hggcraig]

Wow, glad you're ok after the mugging.
I had two men try to pickpocket me in Angeles, it's so annoying.
Was this in the main tourist part of the city?

[Chooser]

At least you haven’t tried (and failed) to use the quote function again 

Was wondering how to respond to this chump, then realised that other established members have already taken a look at his contributions and offered their own verdicts.

Here they are again. Enjoy 

Hola Jose, nice to be reminded that as well as yourself, there are at least three other tits on Page 3!   

[Vivago]

Wow, glad you're ok after the mugging.
I had two men try to pickpocket me in Angeles, it's so annoying.
Was this in the main tourist part of the city?

Thanks, I'm good now. Knocked me out of my punting stride for all of ten minutes.
Don't think that there is a tourist part of Nairobi. Just areas that are a bit less slummy and dangerous. It makes Manila look like some sort of Utopia.
Angeles is full of thieving scum but fortunately most are of the sneak variety.
Btw, before someone like SadJose points it out, I meant Geo-diversity, not bio-diversity.

[hggcraig]

Thanks, I'm good now. Knocked me out of my punting stride for all of ten minutes.
Don't think that there is a tourist part of Nairobi. Just areas that are a bit less slummy and dangerous. It makes Manila look like some sort of Utopia.
Angeles is full of thieving scum but fortunately most are of the sneak variety.
Btw, before someone like SadJose points it out, I meant Geo-diversity, not bio-diversity.

Aww ok when I researched Nairobi I read Westlands is supposed to be safer than the rest of the city.

Are you gonna keep returning to Nairobi in the future after this event?

[Vivago]

Aww ok when I researched Nairobi I read Westlands is supposed to be safer than the rest of the city.

Are you gonna keep returning to Nairobi in the future after this event?

Westlands is the supposedly upmarket part of town and is marginally safer providing you are not there during one of the occasional terror attacks.

This was always intended to be my last trip to Kenya.

[hggcraig]

Well I hope you enjoy the rest of you're trip.

I've really enjoyed reading all of your reports.

[Paul Shanahan]

Great posts, Vivago. I'm leaving the UK to work elsewhere before too long, and your posts are a very useful guide.

[Golden Hind]

I go to Kenya this week, thinking 7 days Mombasa then 3 days Nairobi, punting is always better at the beach towns I find compared to the Cities and more to do during the day.

You can set your location for free on tagged so I've got some numbers from there but it's not a great app, I'll set my tinder location out there a few days before.

Do you just use tinder when out there vivago?

[Vivago]

I go to Kenya this week, thinking 7 days Mombasa then 3 days Nairobi, punting is always better at the beach towns I find compared to the Cities and more to do during the day.

You can set your location for free on tagged so I've got some numbers from there but it's not a great app, I'll set my tinder location out there a few days before.

Do you just use tinder when out there vivago?

You have probably got your amount of time spent city v beach worked out about right. Are you actually staying out at one of the beaches or in Mombasa itself?

I have only used tinder whilst here. It is the app that all the girls seem to use to the exclusion of any other and is all you will need. You hardly need to bother using it until maybe a couple of days before your flight as you will be inundated with 'likes' from day 1. It's as easy as shooting fish in a barrel and the only difficult part is choosing which of the dusky lovelies to pick.

Have fun and watch yourself in Nairobi.

[Golden Hind]

You have probably got your amount of time spent city v beach worked out about right. Are you actually staying out at one of the beaches or in Mombasa itself?

I have only used tinder whilst here. It is the app that all the girls seem to use to the exclusion of any other and is all you will need. You hardly need to bother using it until maybe a couple of days before your flight as you will be inundated with 'likes' from day 1. It's as easy as shooting fish in a barrel and the only difficult part is choosing which of the dusky lovelies to pick.

Have fun and watch yourself in Nairobi.

I have booked just 2 night at an apartment in Mtwapa as my notes from ISG have that as the place, though it seems far out so I might move once I know the best place.

[Vivago]

I have booked just 2 night at an apartment in Mtwapa as my notes from ISG have that as the place, though it seems far out so I might move once I know the best place.

I stayed in Mtwapa. It’s a dusty, typically African shithole town during the day but at night it transforms into one enormous brothel for both foreigners and locals alike. It’s fairly close to the beaches at Bamburi although, if I were you, I’d give Jomo Kenyatta public beach a swerve unless you don’t mind being mercilessly hassled by zillions of beach boys trying to sell you cheap trinkets, jewellery, drugs, their grandmother/mothers/sisters etc.


The nicest beach is further north (nearer Mtwapi) at Shanzu. These are really private but nobody will stop you using the beach. You still get pestered by beach bums but not to the same degree as at the public beach. You might occasionally get approached by girls on the prowl for a daytime earner. Some are quite pretty but be careful that they are not underage.

Have fun.

[Vivago]

Well I survived my latest and probably final Kenyan/African adventure and here a summing up of the trip. I spent a total of 45 days in Africa, comprising of 26 days in the Mombasa area, 10 days in South Africa (no opportunity to misbehave) and 9 days in Nairobi. I enjoyed a total of 9 punts, 7 in Mombasa and 2 in Nairobi. Although there was no stand out encounter amongst the 9, nor was there any complete duds. My last punt before I let Nairobi was with a 22 year old transcriber who told me that she had no kids so I was a little surprised when she got her kit off to discover a wrinkled tummy, When I asked her about it she said it wasn’t due to giving birth but because she had been on a diet recently and had lost 10 kg. Trust me to end up with Nairobi’s Miss Weightwatchers 2019! The sex was ho-hum and she was a bit of a fake moaner as well.

[hggcraig]

Would you still recommend going to Nairobi and staying in Westlands then despite your recent incident?
I like a big city, so Mombasa has no appeal to me unfortunately.
Cheers

[Vivago]

Would you still recommend going to Nairobi and staying in Westlands then despite your recent incident?
I like a big city, so Mombasa has no appeal to me unfortunately.
Cheers

Yes, go for it. Don't become paranoid about your safety. Just be careful and stay in the expat areas such as Westlands. You will be alright. You are probably statistically more likely to be mugged on a London street than you are on a street in Nairobi.

[hggcraig]

Brilliant thanks.

I wanna try Africa, although I prefer the lighter brown women I understand Kenya is best for a newbie.

Looking forward to your next report, wherever that may be.

[Golden Hind]

I can see why you keep coming back here. Halfway through my trip and it's already my favourite punting destination. The clubs here are amazing, music and dancing is better than anywhere I've been. The club I went to last night had a twerking competition, outrageous stuff. I spend all night in there with a indian kenyan girl drinking, dancing and shisha and the bill comes to about £24 at the end, then take the girl home without discussing anything and give her about £23 in the morning for 'taxi money' and she puts it in her bag without even looking at it. Previous nights have been similar, only one average experience so far.

[hggcraig]

Thanks for the update.

Are you staying in Westlands? Do you find the women facially attractive?

Cheers

[Mikey123]

I can see why you keep coming back here. Halfway through my trip and it's already my favourite punting destination. The clubs here are amazing, music and dancing is better than anywhere I've been. The club I went to last night had a twerking competition, outrageous stuff. I spend all night in there with a indian kenyan girl drinking, dancing and shisha and the bill comes to about £24 at the end, then take the girl home without discussing anything and give her about £23 in the morning for 'taxi money' and she puts it in her bag without even looking at it. Previous nights have been similar, only one average experience so far.

Did you pick her up from the club?

[Golden Hind]

Thanks for the update.

Are you staying in Westlands? Do you find the women facially attractive?

Cheers

Westlands is Nairobi. I'm in Mombasa, nyali area. Mtwappa is too many old white men and their regular girls, nearly all german, so atmosphere isn't as good in bars so I moved, there were still some good looking girl around there, but most girls I've met look down on that area. Nyali clubs have better mix of people, majority black so better night out, not just a 100% brothel. I do find them attractive, plenty arn't though and it's those girls that approach you all the time.

[hggcraig]

Thanks for the reply, appreciate it.
Enjoy the rest of your trip.

[Golden Hind]

Did you pick her up from the club?

No tinder, my theory is no decent girl is in a club midweek or at least odds aren't in your favour so I've been going on tinder dates mainly, though yesterday club was packed and I wouldn't of minded being there alone.

[mace-window]

My bank manager complained that I was spending too much and should set aside some for the future. What future, I replied. The government will only filch it all in care charges when I’m completely gaga and dressed in the latest fashion of adult sanitary diapers, sat drooling in front a nursing home telly showing endless repeats of Homes Under The Hammer.

So better get out and spend some more while I still have most of my marbles and a libido that swings alarmingly between zero and hero, sometimes in the space of a single day.  Time was, not so long ago, that I could get it up two or even, if I’d had an extra weetabix, three time in a day and still have the energy to wobble down the pub. And give me a couple of days recovery and I was ready to go again. Try that now and the only place I’d be going is the intensive care unit of the nearest hospital.

So don’t expect too much of me on this trip. The spirit still resembles that of a randy teenager but the flesh is oh so weak.

I’m in Kenya because black ladies, particularly young attractive African black ladies do something for me which no amount of little blue or orange pills can match. And Kenya is full of more available ladies matching this description than you could shake a perfectly formed black bottom at. I’ll be off revving up my zimmer frame and chasing the classy lasses to be found in Nairobi next month but this month I’m slumming it in Mombasa. Well to be more accurate, Mtwapi near Bamburi Beach. Mtwapi is a strange hybrid sort of place. By day it is an average sort of dusty, traffic clogged Kenyan towns. But by night it takes on a far different complexion. As the African sun sets and the darkness creeps in, so do all the night people come out to play. Innumerable small bars and some big ones.open their doors and are rapidly filled with every conceivable kind of female of the species, old and young (some obviously far too young), fat or skinny, beautiful and as ugly as darkest sin. But all with a common objective of peddling their pussies to the predominately old and decrepit mzungu’s (white men) that frequent these places. I should feel right at home but its all too desperate and seedy for my liking and so I shall not be joining their ranks. Pussy which can be had for a few Kenyan bob is not pussy that I will be lusting after anytime soon.

So its back to the usual online options for me. Seeking is not a great deal of use here. Tinder is king and all the girls use it to hook up with Mzungu’s. So far I have had two nice encounters, the latest of whom has only recently left. The first was interesting as she claimed to cuckholding her 75 year old German boyfriend with me a sprightly mere stripling at 65. She is 22. She seemed to be in quite a hurry so I filled her mouth with Mzungu juice and let her go home to her septuagenarian lover,

The one I have just despatched out the door is a rather lovely young thing who, on disrobing, turned out to be an obvious milf. So again it was one pop and away, this time in the growler. So nothing special yet and so, weather permitting (its the rainy season) I will be off down the beach this weekend to see what we will see.

 

Glad you are having a great time Vivago. My homeland is near Kenya so I know a bit about Kenya myself. Well not the night life. Though I do find the young black Kenyan cuckholding her 75 year old German boyfriend funny. Did not knew cuckholfding was strong their or clubs with women hunting for white men.

All the best Vivago. 

[Golden Hind]

Left Kenya now, didn't enjoy Nairobi as much as Mombasa but if you just care about optics that's where the stunners are. I will be back to Mombasa or maybe another spot in east africa next year for sure.

[AppleEgg]

I can see why you keep coming back here. Halfway through my trip and it's already my favourite punting destination. The clubs here are amazing, music and dancing is better than anywhere I've been. The club I went to last night had a twerking competition, outrageous stuff. I spend all night in there with a indian kenyan girl drinking, dancing and shisha and the bill comes to about £24 at the end, then take the girl home without discussing anything and give her about £23 in the morning for 'taxi money' and she puts it in her bag without even looking at it. Previous nights have been similar, only one average experience so far.

What was the name of the place you went to?  Any recommendations for Nairobi or Mombasa on where to pick up good looking girls?